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Act 3, Scene 1 — Troy. Priam’s palace.
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The argument Pandarus visits Paris and Helen at their palace; he banters with a clever servant, gets Helen to let him sing a bawdy love song, and arranges for Paris to cover Troilus's absence at supper so Troilus can meet Cressida.
Music sounds within. Enter Pandarus and a Servant.
PANDARUS dialogue

Friend, you—pray you, a word. Do you not follow the young Lord Paris?

Friend, you—pray you, a word. Do you not follow the young Lord Paris?

friend, you—pray you, a word. do you not follow the young lord paris?

friend, you—pray you, a word. do you not follow the young

SERVANT dialogue

Ay, sir, when he goes before me.

Ay, sir, when he goes before me.

ay, sir, when he goes before me.

ay, sir, when he goes before me.

PANDARUS dialogue

You depend upon him, I mean?

You depend upon him, I mean?

you depend upon him, i mean?

you depend upon him, i mean?

SERVANT dialogue

Sir, I do depend upon the Lord.

Sir, I do depend upon the Lord.

sir, i do depend upon the lord.

sir, i do depend upon the lord.

"I do depend upon the Lord" The servant switches 'the lord' (Paris) for 'the Lord' (God) — a sly ambiguity Pandarus doesn't notice, but which sets up the whole exchange of deliberate misunderstandings.
PANDARUS dialogue

You depend upon a notable gentleman; I must needs praise him.

You depend upon a notable gentleman; I must needs praise him.

you depend upon a notable gentleman; i must needs praise him.

you depend upon a notable gentleman; i must needs praise

SERVANT dialogue

The Lord be praised!

The Lord be praised!

the lord be praised!

the lord be praised!

PANDARUS dialogue

You know me, do you not?

You know me, do you not?

you know me, do you not?

you know me, do you not?

SERVANT dialogue

Faith, sir, superficially.

Faith, sir, superficially.

faith, sir, superficially.

faith, sir, superficially.

PANDARUS dialogue

Friend, know me better: I am the Lord Pandarus.

Friend, know me better: I am the Lord Pandarus.

friend, know me better: i'm the lord pandarus.

friend, know me better: i'm the lord pandarus.

SERVANT dialogue

I hope I shall know your honour better.

I hope I shall know your honour better.

i hope i shall know your honour better.

i hope i shall know your honour better.

PANDARUS dialogue

I do desire it.

I do desire it.

i do desire it.

i do desire it.

SERVANT dialogue

You are in the state of grace?

You are in the state of grace?

you're in the state of grace?

you're in the state of grace?

PANDARUS dialogue

Grace? Not so, friend; honour and lordship are my titles. What music is

this?

Grace? Not so, friend; honour and lordship are my titles. What music is this?

grace? not so, friend; honour and lordship are my titles. what music is this?

grace? not so, friend; honour and lordship are my titles.

SERVANT dialogue

I do but partly know, sir; it is music in parts.

I do but partly know, sir; it is music in parts.

i do but partly know, sir; it is music in parts.

i do but partly know, sir; it is music in parts.

"it is music in parts" The servant puns on 'partly': he only knows it 'in part,' and the music itself is in parts (harmonically arranged for multiple voices). Every answer the servant gives is both accurate and a gentle trap.
PANDARUS dialogue

Know you the musicians?

Know you the musicians?

know you the musicians?

know you the musicians?

SERVANT dialogue

Wholly, sir.

Wholly, sir.

wholly, sir.

wholly, sir.

PANDARUS dialogue

Who play they to?

Who play they to?

who play they to?

who play they to?

SERVANT dialogue

To the hearers, sir.

To the hearers, sir.

to the hearers, sir.

to the hearers, sir.

PANDARUS dialogue

At whose pleasure, friend?

At whose pleasure, friend?

at whose pleasure, friend?

at whose pleasure, friend?

SERVANT dialogue

At mine, sir, and theirs that love music.

At mine, sir, and theirs that love music.

at mine, sir, and theirs that love music.

at mine, sir, and theirs that love music.

PANDARUS dialogue

Command, I mean, friend.

Command, I mean, friend.

command, i mean, friend.

command, i mean, friend.

SERVANT dialogue

Who shall I command, sir?

Who shall I command, sir?

who shall i command, sir?

who shall i command, sir?

PANDARUS dialogue

Friend, we understand not one another: I am too courtly, and thou art

too cunning. At whose request do these men play?

Friend, we understand not one another: I am too courtly, and you art too cunning. At whose request do these men play?

friend, we understand not one another: i'm too courtly, and you art too cunning. at whose request do these men play?

friend, we understand not one another: i'm too courtly, and

SERVANT dialogue

That’s to’t, indeed, sir. Marry, sir, at the request of Paris my lord,

who is there in person; with him the mortal Venus, the heart-blood of

beauty, love’s invisible soul—

That’s to’t, indeed, sir. Marry, sir, at the request of Paris my lord, who is there in person; with him the mortal Venus, the heart-blood of beauty, love’s invisible soul—

that’s to’t, indeed, sir. marry, sir, at the request of paris my lord, who is there in person; with him the mortal venus, the heart-blood of beauty, love’s invisible soul—

that’s to’t, indeed, sir. marry, sir, at the request of

PANDARUS dialogue

Who, my cousin, Cressida?

Who, my cousin, Cressida?

who, my cousin, cressida?

who, my cousin, cressida?

SERVANT dialogue

No, sir, Helen. Could not you find out that by her attributes?

No, sir, Helen. Could not you find out that by her attributes?

no, sir, helen. could not you find out that by her attributes?

no, sir, helen. could not you find out that by her

PANDARUS dialogue

It should seem, fellow, that thou hast not seen the Lady Cressida. I

come to speak with Paris from the Prince Troilus; I will make a

complimental assault upon him, for my business seethes.

It should seem, fellow, that you hast not seen the Lady Cressida. I come to speak with Paris from the Prince Troilus; I will make a complimental assault upon him, for my business seethes.

it should seem, fellow, that you hast not seen the lady cressida. i come to speak with paris from the prince troilus; i will make a complimental assault upon him, for my business seethes.

it should seem, fellow, that you hast not seen the lady

SERVANT dialogue

Sodden business! There’s a stew’d phrase indeed!

Sodden business! There’s a stew’d phrase indeed!

sodden business! there’s a stew’d phrase indeed!

sodden business! there’s a stew’d phrase indeed!

Enter Paris and Helen, attended.
PANDARUS dialogue

Fair be to you, my lord, and to all this fair company! Fair desires, in

all fair measure, fairly guide them—especially to you, fair queen! Fair

thoughts be your fair pillow.

Fair be to you, my lord, and to all this fair company! Fair desires, in all fair measure, fairly guide them—especially to you, fair queen! Fair thoughts be your fair pillow.

fair be to you, my lord, and to all this fair company! fair desires, in all fair measure, fairly guide them—especially to you, fair queen! fair thoughts be your fair pillow.

fair be to you, my lord, and to all this fair company! fair

First appearance
HELEN

Helen speaks in short, playful assertions — she's charming, superficial, and completely unaware of (or unbothered by) her function as the war's justification. Watch for how little she actually says about anything that matters.

HELEN dialogue

Dear lord, you are full of fair words.

Dear lord, you are full of fair words.

dear lord, you're full of fair words.

dear lord, you're full of fair words.

PANDARUS dialogue

You speak your fair pleasure, sweet queen. Fair prince, here is good

broken music.

You speak your fair pleasure, sweet queen. Fair prince, here is good broken music.

you speak your fair pleasure, sweet queen. fair prince, here is good broken music.

you speak your fair pleasure, sweet queen. fair prince,

PARIS dialogue

You have broke it, cousin; and by my life, you shall make it whole

again; you shall piece it out with a piece of your performance.

You have broke it, cousin; and by my life, you shall make it whole again; you shall piece it out with a piece of your performance.

you've broke it, cousin; and by my life, you shall make it whole again; you shall piece it out with a piece of your performance.

you've broke it, cousin; and by my life, you shall make it

HELEN dialogue

He is full of harmony.

He is full of harmony.

he is full of harmony.

he is full of harmony.

PANDARUS dialogue

Truly, lady, no.

Truly, lady, no.

truly, lady, no.

truly, lady, no.

HELEN dialogue

O, sir—

O, sir—

o, sir—

o, sir—

PANDARUS dialogue

Rude, in sooth; in good sooth, very rude.

Rude, in sooth; in good sooth, very rude.

rude, in sooth; in good sooth, very rude.

rude, in sooth; in good sooth, very rude.

PARIS dialogue

Well said, my lord. Well, you say so in fits.

Well said, my lord. Well, you say so in fits.

well said, my lord. well, you say so in fits.

well said, my lord. well, you say so in fits.

PANDARUS dialogue

I have business to my lord, dear queen. My lord, will you vouchsafe me

a word?

I have business to my lord, dear queen. My lord, will you vouchsafe me a word?

i've business to my lord, dear queen. my lord, will you vouchsafe me a word?

i've business to my lord, dear queen. my lord, will you

HELEN dialogue

Nay, this shall not hedge us out. We’ll hear you sing, certainly—

Nay, this shall not hedge us out. We’ll hear you sing, certainly—

nay, this shall not hedge us out. we’ll hear you sing, certainly—

nay, this shall not hedge us out. we’ll hear you sing,

PANDARUS dialogue

Well sweet queen, you are pleasant with me. But, marry, thus, my lord:

my dear lord and most esteemed friend, your brother Troilus—

Well sweet queen, you are pleasant with me. But, marry, thus, my lord: my dear lord and most esteemed friend, your brother Troilus—

well sweet queen, you're pleasant with me. but, marry, thus, my lord: my dear lord and most esteemed friend, your brother troilus—

well sweet queen, you're pleasant with me. but, marry,

HELEN dialogue

My Lord Pandarus, honey-sweet lord—

My Lord Pandarus, honey-sweet lord—

my lord pandarus, honey-sweet lord—

my lord pandarus, honey-sweet lord—

PANDARUS dialogue

Go to, sweet queen, go to—commends himself most affectionately to you—

Go to, sweet queen, go to—commends himself most affectionately to you—

go to, sweet queen, go to—commends himself most affectionately to you—

go to, sweet queen, go to—commends himself most

HELEN dialogue

You shall not bob us out of our melody. If you do, our melancholy upon

your head!

You shall not bob us out of our melody. If you do, our melancholy upon your head!

you shall not bob us out of our melody. if you do, our melancholy upon your head!

you shall not bob us out of our melody. if you do, our

PANDARUS dialogue

Sweet queen, sweet queen; that’s a sweet queen, i’ faith.

Sweet queen, sweet queen; that’s a sweet queen, i’ faith.

sweet queen, sweet queen; that’s a sweet queen, i’ faith.

sweet queen, sweet queen; that’s a sweet queen, i’ faith.

HELEN dialogue

And to make a sweet lady sad is a sour offence.

And to make a sweet lady sad is a sour offence.

and to make a sweet lady sad is a sour offence.

and to make a sweet lady sad is a sour offence.

PANDARUS dialogue

Nay, that shall not serve your turn; that shall it not, in truth, la.

Nay, I care not for such words; no, no.—And, my lord, he desires you

that, if the King call for him at supper, you will make his excuse.

Nay, that shall not serve your turn; that shall it not, in truth, la. Nay, I care not for such words; no, no.—And, my lord, he desires you that, if the King call for him at supper, you will make his excuse.

nay, that shall not serve your turn; that shall it not, in truth, la. nay, i care not for such words; no, no.—and, my lord, he desires you that, if the king call for him at supper, you will make his excuse.

nay, that shall not serve your turn; that shall it not, in

HELEN dialogue

My Lord Pandarus!

My Lord Pandarus!

my lord pandarus!

my lord pandarus!

PANDARUS dialogue

What says my sweet queen, my very very sweet queen?

What says my sweet queen, my very very sweet queen?

what says my sweet queen, my very very sweet queen?

what says my sweet queen, my very very sweet queen?

PARIS dialogue

What exploit’s in hand? Where sups he tonight?

What exploit’s in hand? Where sups he tonight?

what exploit’s in hand? where sups he tonight?

what exploit’s in hand? where sups he tonight?

HELEN dialogue

Nay, but, my lord—

Nay, but, my lord—

nay, but, my lord—

nay, but, my lord—

PANDARUS dialogue

What says my sweet queen?—My cousin will fall out with you.

What says my sweet queen?—My cousin will fall out with you.

what says my sweet queen?—my cousin will fall out with you.

what says my sweet queen?—my cousin will fall out with you.

HELEN dialogue

You must not know where he sups.

You must not know where he sups.

you must not know where he sups.

you must not know where he sups.

PARIS dialogue

I’ll lay my life, with my disposer Cressida.

I’ll lay my life, with my disposer Cressida.

i’ll lay my life, with my disposer cressida.

i’ll lay my life, with my disposer cressida.

PANDARUS dialogue

No, no, no such matter; you are wide. Come, your disposer is sick.

No, no, no such matter; you are wide. Come, your disposer is sick.

no, no, no such matter; you're wide. come, your disposer is sick.

no, no, no such matter; you're wide. come, your disposer is

PARIS dialogue

Well, I’ll make’s excuse.

Well, I’ll make’s excuse.

well, i’ll make’s excuse.

well, i’ll make’s excuse.

PANDARUS ≋ verse dialogue

Ay, good my lord. Why should you say Cressida?

No, your poor disposer’s sick.

Ay, good my lord. Why should you say Cressida? No, your poor disposer’s sick.

ay, good my lord. why should you say cressida? no, your poor disposer’s sick.

ay, good my lord. why should you say cressida? no, your

PARIS dialogue

I spy.

I spy.

i spy.

i spy.

PANDARUS dialogue

You spy! What do you spy?—Come, give me an instrument. Now, sweet

queen.

You spy! What do you spy?—Come, give me an instrument. Now, sweet queen.

you spy! what do you spy?—come, give me an instrument. now, sweet queen.

you spy! what do you spy?—come, give me an instrument. now,

HELEN dialogue

Why, this is kindly done.

Why, this is kindly done.

why, this is kindly done.

why, this is kindly done.

PANDARUS dialogue

My niece is horribly in love with a thing you have, sweet queen.

My niece is horribly in love with a thing you have, sweet queen.

my niece is horribly in love with a thing you've, sweet queen.

my niece is horribly in love with a thing you've, sweet

HELEN dialogue

She shall have it, my lord, if it be not my Lord Paris.

She shall have it, my lord, if it be not my Lord Paris.

she shall have it, my lord, if it be not my lord paris.

she shall have it, my lord, if it be not my lord paris.

PANDARUS dialogue

He? No, she’ll none of him; they two are twain.

He? No, she’ll none of him; they two are twain.

he? no, she’ll none of him; they two are twain.

he? no, she’ll none of him; they two are twain.

HELEN dialogue

Falling in, after falling out, may make them three.

Falling in, after falling out, may make them three.

falling in, after falling out, may make them three.

falling in, after falling out, may make them three.

"Falling in, after falling out, may make them three" Helen's bawdy joke: 'falling in' after 'falling out' (reconciliation after a quarrel) might result in a pregnancy. She's barely paying attention to the conversation but manages a perfect innuendo.
PANDARUS dialogue

Come, come. I’ll hear no more of this; I’ll sing you a song now.

Come, come. I’ll hear no more of this; I’ll sing you a song now.

come, come. i’ll hear no more of this; i’ll sing you a song now.

come, come. i’ll hear no more of this; i’ll sing you a song

HELEN dialogue

Ay, ay, prithee now. By my troth, sweet lord, thou hast a fine

forehead.

Ay, ay, prithee now. By my troth, sweet lord, you hast a fine forehead.

ay, ay, prithee now. by my troth, sweet lord, you hast a fine forehead.

ay, ay, prithee now. by my troth, sweet lord, you hast a

PANDARUS dialogue

Ay, you may, you may.

Ay, you may, you may.

ay, you may, you may.

ay, you may, you may.

HELEN dialogue

Let thy song be love. This love will undo us all. O Cupid, Cupid,

Cupid!

Let your song be love. This love will undo us all. O Cupid, Cupid, Cupid!

let your song be love. this love will undo us all. o cupid, cupid, cupid!

let your song be love. this love will undo us all. o cupid,

🎭 Dramatic irony Helen says 'this love will undo us all' as a pleasant joke at a musical afternoon. It's the most accurate thing she says in the play. The audience knows she's right about everything except its being a joke.
PANDARUS dialogue

Love! Ay, that it shall, i’ faith.

Love! Ay, that it shall, i’ faith.

love! ay, that it shall, i’ faith.

love! ay, that it shall, i’ faith.

PARIS dialogue

Ay, good now, love, love, nothing but love.

Ay, good now, love, love, nothing but love.

ay, good now, love, love, nothing but love.

ay, good now, love, love, nothing but love.

PANDARUS dialogue

In good troth, it begins so.

In good troth, it begins so.

in good troth, it begins so.

in good troth, it begins so.

[_Sings_.]
_Love, love, nothing but love, still love, still more!
For, oh, love’s bow
Shoots buck and doe;
The shaft confounds
Not that it wounds,
But tickles still the sore.
These lovers cry, O ho, they die!
Yet that which seems the wound to kill
Doth turn O ho! to ha! ha! he!
So dying love lives still.
O ho! a while, but ha! ha! ha!
O ho! groans out for ha! ha! ha!—hey ho!_
HELEN dialogue

In love, i’ faith, to the very tip of the nose.

In love, i’ faith, to the very tip of the nose.

in love, i’ faith, to the very tip of the nose.

in love, i’ faith, to the very tip of the nose.

PARIS dialogue

He eats nothing but doves, love; and that breeds hot blood, and hot

blood begets hot thoughts, and hot thoughts beget hot deeds, and hot

deeds is love.

He eats nothing but doves, love; and that breeds hot blood, and hot blood begets hot thoughts, and hot thoughts beget hot deeds, and hot deeds is love.

he eats nothing but doves, love; and that breeds hot blood, and hot blood begets hot thoughts, and hot thoughts beget hot deeds, and hot deeds is love.

he eats nothing but doves, love; and that breeds hot blood,

PANDARUS dialogue

Is this the generation of love: hot blood, hot thoughts, and hot deeds?

Why, they are vipers. Is love a generation of vipers? Sweet lord, who’s

a-field today?

Is this the generation of love: hot blood, hot thoughts, and hot deeds? Why, they are vipers. Is love a generation of vipers? Sweet lord, who’s a-field today?

is this the generation of love: hot blood, hot thoughts, and hot deeds? why, they are vipers. is love a generation of vipers? sweet lord, who’s a-field today?

is this the generation of love: hot blood, hot thoughts,

PARIS dialogue

Hector, Deiphobus, Helenus, Antenor, and all the gallantry of Troy. I

would fain have arm’d today, but my Nell would not have it so. How

chance my brother Troilus went not?

Hector, Deiphobus, Helenus, Antenor, and all the gallantry of Troy. I would fain have arm’d today, but my Nell would not have it so. How chance my brother Troilus went not?

hector, deiphobus, helenus, antenor, and all the gallantry of troy. i would fain have arm’d today, but my nell would not have it so. how chance my brother troilus went not?

hector, deiphobus, helenus, antenor, and all the gallantry

Why it matters Paris gives himself away here — he wanted to fight but 'Nell wouldn't have it.' Helen is keeping him from battle. This is devastating: the cause of the war is keeping its principal architect at home, safe.
↩ Callback to 2-2 Paris couldn't arm today because 'Nell wouldn't have it' — confirming what Priam suggested in 2-2: Paris argues for war on behalf of pleasure, not honor.
HELEN dialogue

He hangs the lip at something. You know all, Lord Pandarus.

He hangs the lip at something. You know all, Lord Pandarus.

he hangs the lip at something. you know all, lord pandarus.

he hangs the lip at something. you know all, lord pandarus.

PANDARUS dialogue

Not I, honey-sweet queen. I long to hear how they spend today. You’ll

remember your brother’s excuse?

Not I, honey-sweet queen. I long to hear how they spend today. You’ll remember your brother’s excuse?

not i, honey-sweet queen. i long to hear how they spend today. you’ll remember your brother’s excuse?

not i, honey-sweet queen. i long to hear how they spend

PARIS dialogue

To a hair.

To a hair.

to a hair.

to a hair.

PANDARUS dialogue

Farewell, sweet queen.

Farewell, sweet queen.

farewell, sweet queen.

farewell, sweet queen.

HELEN dialogue

Commend me to your niece.

Commend me to your niece.

commend me to your niece.

commend me to your niece.

PANDARUS dialogue

I will, sweet queen.

I will, sweet queen.

i will, sweet queen.

i will, sweet queen.

[_Exit. Sound a retreat_.]
PARIS ≋ verse dialogue

They’re come from the field. Let us to Priam’s hall

To greet the warriors. Sweet Helen, I must woo you

To help unarm our Hector. His stubborn buckles,

With these your white enchanting fingers touch’d,

Shall more obey than to the edge of steel

Or force of Greekish sinews; you shall do more

Than all the island kings—disarm great Hector.

They’re come from the field. Let us to Priam’s hall To greet the warriors. Sweet Helen, I must woo you To help unarm our Hector. His stubborn buckles, With these your white enchanting fingers touch’d, Shall more obey than to the edge of steel Or force of Greekish sinews; you shall do more Than all the island kings—disarm great Hector.

they’re come from the field. let us to priam’s hall to greet the warriors. sweet helen, i must woo you to help unarm our hector. his stubborn buckles, with these your white enchanting fingers touch’d, shall more obey than to the edge of steel or force of greekish sinews; you shall do more than all the island kings—disarm great hector.

they’re come from the field. let us to priam’s hall to

HELEN ≋ verse dialogue

’Twill make us proud to be his servant, Paris;

Yea, what he shall receive of us in duty

Gives us more palm in beauty than we have,

Yea, overshines ourself.

’Twill make us proud to be his servant, Paris; Yea, what he shall receive of us in duty Gives us more palm in beauty than we have, Yea, overshines ourself.

’twill make us proud to be his servant, paris; yea, what he shall receive of us in duty gives us more palm in beauty than we have, yea, overshines ourself.

’twill make us proud to be his servant, paris; yea, what he

PARIS dialogue

Sweet, above thought I love thee.

Sweet, above thought I love you.

sweet, above thought i love you.

sweet, above thought i love you.

[_Exeunt_.]

The Reckoning

This is the comic relief scene that surrounds itself in rot. Paris and Helen seem playful, carefree — but they're the reason Troy is burning. Pandarus's love song is funny and lewd. Helen's laughter is genuine. Everything is charming and hollow. The scene shows us the couple at the center of the war: not scheming, not tragic, just shallow. The whole world is dying for their afternoon.

If this happened today…

A celebrity influencer couple laze around their penthouse while their PR crisis plays out — a fire they started. Their manager drops by with a favor to ask (cover for someone tonight), they flirt and laugh and ask him to sing, and they agree to everything without really tracking what's happening. Their content is gorgeous. Their city is on fire. They'll post about it later.

Continue to 3.2 →