← 4.3
Act 4, Scene 4 — Padua. Before Baptista’s house.
on stage:
Next: 4.5 →
Original
Faithful Conversational Text-message
The argument Tranio's scheme reaches its climax as the fake Vincentio meets Baptista, an elopement is set in motion, and Biondello reveals to Lucentio that a priest at Saint Luke's stands ready.
Enter Tranio and the Pedant dressed like Vincentio
TRANIO TRANIO's moment

Sir, this is the house; please it you that I call?

Sir, this is the house; please it you that I call?

Sir, this is the house; please it you that I call?

Sir, this is the house; please it you that I call?

PEDANT ≋ verse PEDANT's moment

Ay, what else? and, but I be deceived,

Signior Baptista may remember me,

Near twenty years ago in Genoa,

Where we were lodgers at the Pegasus.

Ay, what else? and, but I be deceived, Signior Baptista may remember me, Near twenty years ago in Genoa, Where we were lodgers at the Pegasus.

Ay, what else? and, but I be deceived, Signior Baptista may remember me, Near twenty years ago in Ge...

Ay, what else? and, but I be deceived, Signior Baptista may remember me, Near twenty...

TRANIO ≋ verse TRANIO's moment

’Tis well; and hold your own, in any case,

With such austerity as ’longeth to a father.

’Tis well; and hold your own, in any case, With such austerity as ’longeth to a father.

’Tis well; and hold your own, in any case, With such austerity as ’longeth to a father.

’Tis well; and hold your own, in any case, With such austerity as ’longeth to a father.

PEDANT ≋ verse PEDANT's moment

I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy;

’Twere good he were school’d.

I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy; ’Twere good he were school’d.

I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy; ’Twere good he were school’d.

I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy; ’Twere good he were school’d.

Enter Biondello.
TRANIO ≋ verse TRANIO's moment

Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello,

Now do your duty throughly, I advise you.

Imagine ’twere the right Vincentio.

Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello, Now do your duty throughly, I advise you. Imagine ’twere the right Vincentio.

Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello, Now do your duty throughly, I advise you. Imagine ’twere the rig...

Fear you not him. Sirrah Biondello, Now do your duty throughly, I advise you. Imagine ’twere the right Vincentio.

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

Tut! fear not me.

Tut! fear not me.

Tut! fear not me.

Tut! fear not me.

TRANIO TRANIO's moment

But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista?

But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista?

But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista?

But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista?

BIONDELLO ≋ verse BIONDELLO's moment

I told him that your father was at Venice,

And that you look’d for him this day in Padua.

I told him that your father was at Venice, And that you look’d for him this day in Padua.

I told him that your father was at Venice, And that you look’d for him this day in Padua.

I told him that your father was at Venice, And that you look’d for him this day in Padua.

TRANIO ≋ verse TRANIO's moment

Th’art a tall fellow; hold thee that to drink.

Here comes Baptista. Set your countenance, sir.

Th’art a tall fellow; hold thee that to drink. Here comes Baptista. Set your countenance, sir.

Th’art a tall fellow; hold thee that to drink. Here comes Baptista. Set your countenance, sir.

Th’art a tall fellow; hold thee that to drink. Here comes Baptista. Set your countenance, sir.

Enter Baptista and Lucentio.
Signior Baptista, you are happily met.
[_To the Pedant_] Sir, this is the gentleman I told you of;
I pray you stand good father to me now;
Give me Bianca for my patrimony.
PEDANT ≋ verse PEDANT's moment

Soft, son!

Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua

To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio

Made me acquainted with a weighty cause

Of love between your daughter and himself:

And,—for the good report I hear of you,

And for the love he beareth to your daughter,

And she to him,—to stay him not too long,

I am content, in a good father’s care,

To have him match’d; and, if you please to like

No worse than I, upon some agreement

Me shall you find ready and willing

With one consent to have her so bestow’d;

For curious I cannot be with you,

Signior Baptista, of whom I hear so well.

Soft, son! Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio Made me acquainted with a weighty cause Of love between y...

Soft, son! Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio Made me...

Soft, son! Sir, by your leave: having come to Padua To gather in some debts,...

🎭 Dramatic irony The Pedant performs Vincentio convincingly enough to satisfy Baptista — but the real Vincentio is already traveling toward Padua, arriving in 4-5. The audience who has seen that scene knows the collision is coming.
BAPTISTA ≋ verse BAPTISTA's moment

Sir, pardon me in what I have to say.

Your plainness and your shortness please me well.

Right true it is your son Lucentio here

Doth love my daughter, and she loveth him,

Or both dissemble deeply their affections;

And therefore, if you say no more than this,

That like a father you will deal with him,

And pass my daughter a sufficient dower,

The match is made, and all is done:

Your son shall have my daughter with consent.

Sir, pardon me in what I have to say. Your plainness and your shortness please me well. Right true it is your son Lucentio here Doth love my daughter,...

Sir, pardon me in what I have to say. Your plainness and your shortness please me well. Right true i...

Sir, pardon me in what I have to say. Your plainness and your shortness please...

TRANIO ≋ verse TRANIO's moment

I thank you, sir. Where then do you know best

We be affied, and such assurance ta’en

As shall with either part’s agreement stand?

I thank you, sir. Where then do you know best We be affied, and such assurance ta’en As shall with either part’s agreement stand?

I thank you, sir. Where then do you know best We be affied, and such assurance ta’en As shall with e...

I thank you, sir. Where then do you know best We be affied, and such...

BAPTISTA ≋ verse BAPTISTA's moment

Not in my house, Lucentio, for you know

Pitchers have ears, and I have many servants;

Besides, old Gremio is hearkening still,

And happily we might be interrupted.

Not in my house, Lucentio, for you know Pitchers have ears, and I have many servants; Besides, old Gremio is hearkening still, And happily we might be...

Not in my house, Lucentio, for you know Pitchers have ears, and I have many servants; Besides, old G...

Not in my house, Lucentio, for you know Pitchers have ears, and I have many...

"Pitchers have ears" A proverb: containers (and servants) overhear things they shouldn't. Baptista is worried that news of the secret betrothal will spread before it's official.
TRANIO ≋ verse TRANIO's moment

Then at my lodging, and it like you:

There doth my father lie; and there this night

We’ll pass the business privately and well.

Send for your daughter by your servant here;

My boy shall fetch the scrivener presently.

The worst is this, that at so slender warning

You are like to have a thin and slender pittance.

Then at my lodging, and it like you: There doth my father lie; and there this night We’ll pass the business privately and well. Send for your daughter...

Then at my lodging, and it like you: There doth my father lie; and there this night We’ll pass the b...

Then at my lodging, and it like you: There doth my father lie; and there...

BAPTISTA ≋ verse BAPTISTA's moment

It likes me well. Cambio, hie you home,

And bid Bianca make her ready straight;

And, if you will, tell what hath happened:

Lucentio’s father is arriv’d in Padua,

And how she’s like to be Lucentio’s wife.

It likes me well. Cambio, hie you home, And bid Bianca make her ready straight; And, if you will, tell what hath happened: Lucentio’s father is arriv’...

It likes me well. Cambio, hie you home, And bid Bianca make her ready straight; And, if you will, te...

It likes me well. Cambio, hie you home, And bid Bianca make her ready straight;...

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

I pray the gods she may, with all my heart!

I pray the gods she may, with all my heart!

I pray the gods she may, with all my heart!

I pray the gods she may, with all my heart!

TRANIO ≋ verse TRANIO's moment

Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone.

Signior Baptista, shall I lead the way?

Welcome! One mess is like to be your cheer;

Come, sir; we will better it in Pisa.

Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone. Signior Baptista, shall I lead the way? Welcome! One mess is like to be your cheer; Come, sir; we will bet...

Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone. Signior Baptista, shall I lead the way? Welcome! One mes...

Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone. Signior Baptista, shall I lead the...

BAPTISTA BAPTISTA's moment

I follow you.

I follow you.

I follow you.

I follow you.

[_Exeunt Tranio, Pedant and Baptista._]
BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

Cambio!

Cambio!

Cambio!

Cambio!

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

What say’st thou, Biondello?

What say’st thou, Biondello?

What say’st thou, Biondello?

What say’st thou, Biondello?

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

You saw my master wink and laugh upon you?

You saw my master wink and laugh upon you?

You saw my master wink and laugh upon you?

You saw my master wink and laugh upon you?

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

Biondello, what of that?

Biondello, what of that?

Biondello, what of that?

Biondello, what of that?

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

Faith, nothing; but has left me here behind to expound the meaning or

moral of his signs and tokens.

Faith, nothing; but has left me here behind to expound the meaning or moral of his signs and tokens.

Faith, nothing; but has left me here behind to expound the meaning or moral of his signs and tokens.

Faith, nothing; but has left me here behind to expound the meaning or moral of his signs and tokens.

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

I pray thee moralize them.

I pray thee moralize them.

I pray thee moralize them.

I pray thee moralize them.

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

Then thus: Baptista is safe, talking with the deceiving father of a

deceitful son.

Then thus: Baptista is safe, talking with the deceiving father of a deceitful son.

Then thus: Baptista is safe, talking with the deceiving father of a deceitful son.

Then thus: Baptista is safe, talking with the deceiving father of a deceitful son.

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

And what of him?

And what of him?

And what of him?

And what of him?

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper.

His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper.

His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper.

His daughter is to be brought by you to the supper.

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

And then?

And then?

And then?

And then?

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

The old priest at Saint Luke’s church is at your command at all hours.

The old priest at Saint Luke’s church is at your command at all hours.

The old priest at Saint Luke’s church is at your command at all hours.

The old priest at Saint Luke’s church is at your command at all hours.

LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

And what of all this?

And what of all this?

And what of all this?

And what of all this?

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

I cannot tell, except they are busied about a counterfeit assurance.

Take your assurance of her, _cum privilegio ad imprimendum solum_; to

the church! take the priest, clerk, and some sufficient honest

witnesses. If this be not that you look for, I have more to say, But

bid Bianca farewell for ever and a day.

I cannot tell, except they are busied about a counterfeit assurance. Take your assurance of her, _cum privilegio ad imprimendum solum_; to the church!...

I cannot tell, except they are busied about a counterfeit assurance. Take your assurance of her, _cu...

I cannot tell, except they are busied about a counterfeit assurance. Take your assurance of...

"cum privilegio ad imprimendum solum" Latin — 'with the exclusive right to print' — a legal term from the book trade meaning sole rights. Biondello is saying: marry her with full exclusive rights, like a printing monopoly. The legal joke is pointed.
[_Going._]
LUCENTIO LUCENTIO's moment

Hear’st thou, Biondello?

Hear’st thou, Biondello?

Hear’st thou, Biondello?

Hear’st thou, Biondello?

BIONDELLO BIONDELLO's moment

I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in an afternoon as she went to

the garden for parsley to stuff a rabbit; and so may you, sir; and so

adieu, sir. My master hath appointed me to go to Saint Luke’s to bid

the priest be ready to come against you come with your appendix.

I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in an afternoon as she went to the garden for parsley to stuff a rabbit; and so may you, sir; and so adieu, sir...

I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in an afternoon as she went to the garden for parsley to stuf...

I cannot tarry: I knew a wench married in an afternoon as she went to...

[_Exit._]
LUCENTIO ≋ verse LUCENTIO's moment

I may, and will, if she be so contented.

She will be pleas’d; then wherefore should I doubt?

Hap what hap may, I’ll roundly go about her;

It shall go hard if Cambio go without her:

I may, and will, if she be so contented. She will be pleas’d; then wherefore should I doubt? Hap what hap may, I’ll roundly go about her; It shall go ...

I may, and will, if she be so contented. She will be pleas’d; then wherefore should I doubt? Hap wha...

I may, and will, if she be so contented. She will be pleas’d; then wherefore...

[_Exit._]

The Reckoning

This is pure plot machinery, but it moves fast and runs on the energy of a plan about to execute — successfully or not. The fake Vincentio is convincing, Baptista is satisfied, and Biondello's rapid-fire briefing to Lucentio at the end has the velocity of someone about to jump off a bridge with the parachute they hope they packed correctly.

If this happened today…

The moment before a heist closes: the forger is playing the mark's father convincingly, the paperwork looks good, the mark is happy, and now someone is whispering the last-minute logistics — priest is waiting, forty-minute window, go now. Everyone knows the con works only if nobody checks the actual ID. Nobody checks.

Continue to 4.5 →