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The argument The four lords expose each other as oath-breakers in a perfectly nested eavesdropping trap: Berowne hides and watches the King read his love poem; they both watch Longaville read his; all three watch Dumaine read his. Then the layers peel back: Longaville exposes Dumaine, the King exposes Longaville, Berowne starts to expose the King—and is himself exposed when Jaquenetta arrives with his intercepted letter to Rosaline. All four confess. Berowne delivers a magnificent speech arguing that love is the highest form of learning, and the four men resolve to woo the French ladies in earnest.
Enter Berowne with a paper in his hand, alone.
BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

The King, he is hunting the deer; I am coursing myself. They have

pitched a toil; I am toiling in a pitch, pitch that defiles. Defile! A

foul word! Well, set thee down, sorrow, for so they say the fool said,

and so say I, and I the fool. Well proved, wit! By the Lord, this love

is as mad as Ajax. It kills sheep, it kills me, I a sheep. Well proved

again, o’ my side! I will not love; if I do, hang me! I’ faith, I will

not. O, but her eye! By this light, but for her eye, I would not love

her; yes, for her two eyes. Well, I do nothing in the world but lie,

and lie in my throat. By heaven, I do love, and it hath taught me to

rhyme, and to be melancholy. And here is part of my rhyme, and here my

melancholy. Well, she hath one o’ my sonnets already. The clown bore

it, the fool sent it, and the lady hath it. Sweet clown, sweeter fool,

sweetest lady! By the world, I would not care a pin if the other three

were in. Here comes one with a paper. God give him grace to groan!

The King, he is hunting the deer; I am coursing myself. They have pitched a toil; I am toiling in a pitch, pitch that defiles. Defile! A foul word! Well, set you down, sorrow, for so they say the fool said, and so say I, and I the fool. Well proved, wit! By the Lord, this love is as mad as Ajax. It kills sheep, it kills me, I a sheep. Well proved again, o’ my side! I will not love; if I do, hang me! I’ faith, I will not. O, but her eye! By this light, but for her eye, I would not love her; yes, for her two eyes. Well, I do nothing in the world but lie, and lie in my throat. By heaven, I do love, and it has taught me to rhyme, and to be melancholy. And here is pare of my rhyme, and here my melancholy. Well, she has one o’ my sonnets already. The clown bore it, the fool sent it, and the lady has it. Sweet clown, sweeter fool, sweetest lady! By the world, I would not care a pin if the other three were in. Here comes one with a paper. God give him grace to groan!

The King, he is hunting the deer; I am coursing myself. They have pitched a toil; I am toiling in a pitch, pitch that defiles. Defile! A foul word! Well, set you down, sorrow, for so they say the fool said, and so say I, and I the fool. Well proved, wit! By the Lord, this love is as mad as Ajax. It

the king, he is hunting the deer; i am coursing myself

Why it matters This opening soliloquy is a masterclass in self-aware self-contradiction. Berowne argues with himself in real time, losing every round to his own desires, until he gives up and surrenders cheerfully. The dramatic irony is exquisite: he thinks he's the only fool in love, but he's about to discover he's the last of four.
[_He stands aside._]
Enter the King with a paper.
KING I'm in pain.

Ay me!

Ay me!

Oh no!

help

[_Aside_.] Shot, by heaven! Proceed, sweet Cupid, thou hast thumped him
BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

with thy birdbolt under the left pap. In faith, secrets!

with your birdbolt under the left pap. In faith, secrets!

with your birdbolt under the left pap. In faith, secrets!

with your birdbolt under the left pap

[_Reads_.] [_So sweet a kiss the golden sun gives not
KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

To those fresh morning drops upon the rose,

As thy eye-beams, when their fresh rays have smote

The night of dew that on my cheeks down flows.

Nor shines the silver moon one half so bright

Through the transparent bosom of the deep

As doth thy face, through tears of mine give light.

Thou shin’st in every tear that I do weep.

No drop but as a coach doth carry thee;

So ridest thou triumphing in my woe.

Do but behold the tears that swell in me,

And they thy glory through my grief will show.

But do not love thyself; then thou wilt keep

My tears for glasses, and still make me weep.

O queen of queens, how far dost thou excel

No thought can think, nor tongue of mortal tell._

How shall she know my griefs? I’ll drop the paper.

Sweet leaves, shade folly. Who is he comes here?

To those fresh morning drops upon the rose, As your eye-beams, when their fresh rays have smote The night of dew that on my cheeks down flows. Nor shines the silver moon one half so bright Through the transparent bosom of the deep As does your face, through tears of mine give light. Thou shin’st in every tear that I do weep. No drop but as a coach does carry you; So ridest you triumphing in my woe. Do but behold the tears that swell in me, And they your glory through my grief will show. But do not love yourself; then you wilt keep My tears for glasses, and still make me weep. O queen of queens, how far do you excel No yought can think, nor tongue of mortal tell._ How shall she know my griefs? I’ll drop the paper. Sweet leaves, shade folly. Who is he comes here?

To those fresh morning drops upon the rose, As your eye-beams, when their fresh rays have smote The night of dew that on my cheeks down flows. Nor shines the silver moon one half so bright Through the transparent bosom of the deep As does your face, through tears of mine give light. Thou shin’st in

to those fresh morning drops upon the rose, as your eye-beams, when their fresh rays have smote the

Why it matters The King's poem is technically proficient and emotionally sincere. Like Berowne's sonnet (read in 4-2), it shows that these men actually feel what they claim to feel. The oath is being broken by real love, not just lust.
[_Steps aside._]
What, Longaville, and reading! Listen, ear.
Enter Longaville with a paper.
[_Aside_.] Now, in thy likeness, one more fool appear!
LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking.

Ay me! I am forsworn.

Ay me! I am forsworn.

Ay me! I am forsworn.

ay me i am forsworn

BEROWNE BEROWNE is commanding action.

Why, he comes in like a perjure, wearing papers.

Why, he comes in like a perjure, wearing papers.

Why, he comes in like a perjure, wearing papers.

why, he comes in like a perjure, wearing papers

KING KING is expressing emotion.

In love, I hope. Sweet fellowship in shame.

In love, I hope. Sweet fellowship in shame.

In love, I hope. Sweet fellowship in shame.

in love, i hope sweet fellowship in shame

BEROWNE BEROWNE is objecting or denying.

One drunkard loves another of the name.

One drunkard loves another of the name.

One drunkard loves another of the name.

one drunkard loves another of the name

LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking.

Am I the first that have been perjured so?

Am I the first that have been perjured so?

Am I the first that have been perjured so?

am i the first that have been perjured so

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

I could put thee in comfort: not by two that I know.

Thou makest the triumviry, the corner-cap of society,

The shape of love’s Tyburn, that hangs up simplicity.

I could put you in comfort: not by two that I know. Thou makest the triumviry, the corner-cap of society, The shape of love’s Tyburn, that hangs up simplicity.

I could put you in comfort: not by two that I know. Thou makest the triumviry, the corner-cap of society, The shape of love’s Tyburn, that hangs up simplicity.

i could put you in comfort: not by two that i know

LONGAVILLE ≋ verse LONGAVILLE is speaking with conviction.

I fear these stubborn lines lack power to move.

O sweet Maria, empress of my love,

These numbers will I tear, and write in prose.

I fear these stubborn lines lack power to move. O sweet Maria, empress of my love, These numbers will I tear, and write in prose.

I fear these stubborn lines lack power to move. O sweet Maria, empress of my love, These numbers will I tear, and write in prose.

i fear these stubborn lines lack power to move

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

O, rhymes are guards on wanton Cupid’s hose.

Disfigure not his shop.

O, rhymes are guards on wanton Cupid’s hose. Disfigure not his shop.

O, rhymes are guards on wanton Cupid’s hose. Disfigure not his shop.

o, rhymes are guards on wanton cupid’s hose

LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is commanding action.

This same shall go.

This same will go.

This same gonna go.

this same shall go

[_He reads the sonnet._]
_Did not the heavenly rhetoric of thine eye,
’Gainst whom the world cannot hold argument,
Persuade my heart to this false perjury?
Vows for thee broke deserve not punishment.
A woman I forswore, but I will prove,
Thou being a goddess, I forswore not thee.
My vow was earthly, thou a heavenly love;
Thy grace being gained, cures all disgrace in me.
Vows are but breath, and breath a vapour is.
Then thou, fair sun, which on my earth dost shine,
Exhal’st this vapour-vow; in thee it is.
If broken then, it is no fault of mine;
If by me broke, what fool is not so wise
To lose an oath to win a paradise?_
BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

This is the liver vein, which makes flesh a deity,

A green goose a goddess. Pure, pure idolatry.

God amend us, God amend! We are much out o’ th’ way.

This is the liver vein, which makes flesh a deity, A green goose a goddess. Pure, pure idolatry. God amend us, God amend! We are much out o’ th’ way.

This is the liver vein, which makes flesh a deity, A green goose a goddess. Pure, pure idolatry. God amend us, God amend! We are much out o’ th’ way.

this is the liver vein, which makes flesh a deity, a green goose a goddess

LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking.

By whom shall I send this?—Company! Stay.

By whom will I send this?—Company! Stay.

By whom gonna I send this?—Company! Stay.

by whom shall i send this —company stay

[_He steps aside._]
Enter Dumaine with a paper.
BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

All hid, all hid, an old infant play.

Like a demigod here sit I in the sky,

And wretched fools’ secrets heedfully o’er-eye.

More sacks to the mill. O heavens, I have my wish.

Dumaine transformed! Four woodcocks in a dish!

All hid, all hid, an old infant play. Like a demigod here sit I in the sky, And wretched fools’ secrets heedfully o’er-eye. More sacks to the mill. O heavens, I have my wish. Dumaine transformed! Four woodcocks in a dish!

All hid, all hid, an old infant play. Like a demigod here sit I in the sky, And wretched fools’ secrets heedfully o’er-eye. More sacks to the mill. O heavens, I have my wish. Dumaine transformed! Four woodcocks in a dish!

all hid, all hid, an old infant play

Why it matters The moment when Berowne discovers Dumaine is the structural climax of the eavesdropping trap — all four are now in the same position. Berowne's delight ('O heavens, I have my wish') is perfect dramatic irony: his wish is about to reverse on him when Jaquenetta arrives.
DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

O most divine Kate!

O most divine Kate!

O most divine Kate!

o most divine kate

BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking.

O most profane coxcomb!

O most profane coxcomb!

O most profane coxcomb!

o most profane coxcomb

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

By heaven, the wonder in a mortal eye!

By heaven, the wonder in a mortal eye!

By heaven, the wonder in a mortal eye!

by heaven, the wonder in a mortal eye

BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking.

By earth, she is but corporal. There you lie.

By earth, she is but corporal. Thbefore you lie.

By earth, she is but corporal. Thbefore you lie.

by earth, she is but corporal thbefore you lie

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

Her amber hairs for foul hath amber quoted.

Her amber hairs for foul has amber quoted.

Her amber hairs for foul has amber quoted.

her amber hairs for foul has amber quoted

BEROWNE BEROWNE is objecting or denying.

An amber-coloured raven was well noted.

An amber-coloured raven was well noted.

An amber-coloured raven was well noted.

an amber-coloured raven was well noted

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

As upright as the cedar.

As upright as the cedar.

As upright as the cedar.

as upright as the cedar

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking.

Stoop, I say.

Her shoulder is with child.

Stoop, I say. Her shoulder is with child.

Stoop, I say. Her shoulder is with child.

stoop, i say her shoulder is with child

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

As fair as day.

As fair as day.

As fair as day.

as fair as day

BEROWNE BEROWNE is objecting or denying.

Ay, as some days, but then no sun must shine.

Ay, as some days, but then no sun must shine.

Ay, as some days, but then no sun must shine.

ay, as some days, but then no sun must shine

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

O, that I had my wish!

O, that I had my wish!

O, that I had my wish!

o, that i had my wish

LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking.

And I had mine!

And I had mine!

And I had mine!

and i had mine

KING KING is commanding action.

And I mine too, good Lord!

And I mine too, good Lord!

And I mine too, good Lord!

and i mine too, good lord

Why it matters Three voices suddenly speaking in unison—the King, Longaville, Dumaine—each wishing for his beloved without knowing the others can hear. The moment is simultaneously absurd and genuinely touching.
BEROWNE BEROWNE is objecting or denying.

Amen, so I had mine. Is not that a good word?

Amen, so I had mine. Is not that a good word?

Amen, so I had mine. Is not that a good word?

amen, so i had mine is not that a good word

Why it matters Berowne reveals himself—accidentally—by joining the chorus of 'I had mine.' He hasn't technically confessed yet, but 'amen' to three forsworn men is a confession of solidarity.
DUMAINE ≋ verse DUMAINE is speaking with conviction.

I would forget her; but a fever she

Reigns in my blood, and will remembered be.

I would forget her; but a fever she Reigns in my blood, and will remembered be.

I would forget her; but a fever she Reigns in my blood, and will remembered be.

i would forget her; but a fever she reigns in my blood, and will remembered be

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

A fever in your blood? Why, then incision

Would let her out in saucers. Sweet misprision!

A fever in your blood? Why, then incision Would let her out in saucers. Sweet misprision!

A fever in your blood? Why, then incision Would let her out in saucers. Sweet misprision!

a fever in your blood

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

Once more I’ll read the ode that I have writ.

Once more I’ll read the ode that I have writ.

Once more I’ll read the ode that I have writ.

once more i’ll read the ode that i have writ

BEROWNE BEROWNE is expressing emotion.

Once more I’ll mark how love can vary wit.

Once more I’ll mark how love can vary wit.

Once more I’ll mark how love can vary wit.

once more i’ll mark how love can vary wit

[_Dumaine reads his sonnet_.]
DUMAINE ≋ verse DUMAINE is speaking with conviction.

_On a day—alack the day!—

Love, whose month is ever May,

Spied a blossom passing fair

Playing in the wanton air.

Through the velvet leaves the wind,

All unseen, can passage find;

That the lover, sick to death,

Wished himself the heaven’s breath.

“Air,” quoth he, “thy cheeks may blow;

Air, would I might triumph so!”

But, alack, my hand is sworn

Ne’er to pluck thee from thy thorn.

Vow, alack, for youth unmeet,

Youth so apt to pluck a sweet.

Do not call it sin in me,

That I am forsworn for thee;

Thou for whom Jove would swear

Juno but an Ethiope were,

And deny himself for Jove,

Turning mortal for thy love._

This will I send, and something else more plain,

That shall express my true love’s fasting pain.

O, would the King, Berowne and Longaville

Were lovers too! Ill, to example ill,

Would from my forehead wipe a perjured note,

For none offend where all alike do dote.

_On a day—alack the day!— Love, whose month is ever May, Spied a blossom passing fair Playing in the wanton air. Through the velvet leaves the wind, All unseen, can passage find; That the lover, sick to death, Wished himself the heaven’s breath. “Air,” quoth he, “your cheeks may blow; Air, would I might triumph so!” But, alack, my hand is sworn Ne’er to pluck you from your thorn. Vow, alack, for youth unmeet, Youth so apt to pluck a sweet. Do not call it sin in me, That I am forsworn for you; Thou for whom Jove would swear Juno but an Ethiope were, And deny himself for Jove, Turning mortal for your love._ This will I send, and something else more plain, That shall express my true love’s fasting pain. O, would the King, Berowne and Longaville Were lovers too! Ill, to example ill, Would from my forehead wipe a perjured note, For none offend where all alike do dote.

_On a day—alack the day!— Love, whose month is ever May, Spied a blossom passing fair Playing in the wanton air. Through the velvet leaves the wind, All unseen, can passage find; That the lover, sick to death, Wished himself the heaven’s breath. “Air,” quoth he, “your cheeks may blow; Air, would I m

_on a day—alack the day

Why it matters Dumaine's wish ('O, would the King, Berowne, and Longaville were lovers too!') is the perfect dramatic irony moment: he doesn't know they're all hidden right there, already in the same position he wishes they were in. The audience can see all four men simultaneously—each hiding from the others—and the comedy of this is the scene's crowning achievement.
[_Comes forward_.] Dumaine, thy love is far from charity,
LONGAVILLE ≋ verse LONGAVILLE is speaking with conviction.

That in love’s grief desir’st society.

You may look pale, but I should blush, I know,

To be o’erheard and taken napping so.

That in love’s grief desir’st society. You may look pale, but I should blush, I know, To be o’erheard and taken napping so.

That in love’s grief desir’st society. You may look pale, but I should blush, I know, To be o’erheard and taken napping so.

that in love’s grief desir’st society

[_Comes forward_.] Come, sir, you blush. As his, your case is such.
KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

You chide at him, offending twice as much.

You do not love Maria? Longaville

Did never sonnet for her sake compile,

Nor never lay his wreathed arms athwart

His loving bosom to keep down his heart.

I have been closely shrouded in this bush,

And marked you both, and for you both did blush.

I heard your guilty rhymes, observed your fashion,

Saw sighs reek from you, noted well your passion.

“Ay, me!” says one. “O Jove!” the other cries.

One, her hairs were gold; crystal the other’s eyes.

You chide at him, offending twice as much. You do not love Maria? Longaville Did never sonnet for her sake compile, Nor never lay his wreathed arms athware His loving bosom to keep down his heare. I have been closely shrouded in this bush, And marked you both, and for you both did blush. I heard your guilty rhymes, observed your fashion, Saw sighs reek from you, noted well your passion. “Ay, me!” says one. “O Jove!” the other cries. One, her hairs were gold; crystal the other’s eyes.

You chide at him, offending twice as much. You do not love Maria? Longaville Did never sonnet for her sake compile, Nor never lay his wreathed arms athware His loving bosom to keep down his heare. I have been closely shrouded in this bush, And marked you both, and for you both did blush. I heard you

you chide at him, offending twice as much

Why it matters The King's exposure of Longaville layers the irony perfectly: a man who was just caught out is now catching someone else. The King doesn't yet know Berowne is watching him. This is the nested structure at its most elegant: Berowne inside the King inside the scene.
[_To Longaville_.] You would for paradise break faith and troth;
[_To Dumaine_.] And Jove, for your love would infringe an oath.
What will Berowne say when that he shall hear
Faith infringed which such zeal did swear?
How will he scorn, how will he spend his wit!
How will he triumph, leap, and laugh at it!
For all the wealth that ever I did see,
I would not have him know so much by me.
[_Comes forward_.]
BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Now step I forth to whip hypocrisy.

Ah, good my liege, I pray thee pardon me.

Good heart, what grace hast thou thus to reprove

These worms for loving, that art most in love?

Your eyes do make no coaches; in your tears

There is no certain princess that appears.

You’ll not be perjured, ’tis a hateful thing:

Tush, none but minstrels like of sonneting!

But are you not ashamed? Nay, are you not,

All three of you, to be thus much o’ershot?

You found his mote, the King your mote did see;

But I a beam do find in each of three.

O, what a scene of foolery have I seen,

Of sighs, of groans, of sorrow, and of teen!

O me, with what strict patience have I sat,

To see a king transformed to a gnat!

To see great Hercules whipping a gig,

And profound Solomon to tune a jig,

And Nestor play at push-pin with the boys,

And critic Timon laugh at idle toys.

Where lies thy grief, O, tell me, good Dumaine?

And, gentle Longaville, where lies thy pain?

And where my liege’s? All about the breast?

A caudle, ho!

Now step I forth to whip hypocrisy. Ah, good my liege, I pray you pardon me. Good heare, what grace hast you thus to reprove These worms for loving, that are most in love? Your eyes do make no coaches; in your tears There is no certain princess that appears. You’ll not be perjured, ’tis a hateful thing: Tush, none but minstrels like of sonneting! But are you not ashamed? Nay, are you not, All three of you, to be thus much o’ershot? You found his mote, the King your mote did see; But I a beam do find in each of three. O, what a scene of foolery have I seen, Of sighs, of groans, of sorrow, and of teen! O me, with what strict patience have I sat, To see a king transformed to a gnat! To see great Hercules whipping a gig, And profound Solomon to tune a jig, And Nestor play at push-pin with the boys, And critic Timon laugh at idle toys. Where lies your grief, O, tell me, good Dumaine? And, gentle Longaville, where lies your pain? And where my liege’s? All about the breast? A caudle, ho!

Now step I forth to whip hypocrisy. Ah, good my liege, I pray you pardon me. Good heare, what grace hast you thus to reprove These worms for loving, that are most in love? Your eyes do make no coaches; in your tears There is no certain princess that appears. You’ll not be perjured, ’tis a hateful th

now step i forth to whip hypocrisy

""
Why it matters Berowne's exposure speech is the scene's comic peak—and then immediately its turning point. He has savored his advantage for about thirty lines before Jaquenetta's entrance strips it from him. The speech's extravagance (Hercules with a spinning top, Solomon tuning a jig) reflects how much he has been storing up, waiting to deploy.
KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

Too bitter is thy jest.

Are we betrayed thus to thy over-view?

Too bitter is your jest. Are we betrayed thus to your over-view?

Too bitter is your jest. Are we betrayed thus to your over-view?

too bitter is your jest

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Not you to me, but I betrayed by you.

I that am honest, I that hold it sin

To break the vow I am engaged in.

I am betrayed by keeping company

With men like you, men of inconstancy.

When shall you see me write a thing in rhyme?

Or groan for Joan? Or spend a minute’s time

In pruning me? When shall you hear that I

Will praise a hand, a foot, a face, an eye,

A gait, a state, a brow, a breast, a waist,

A leg, a limb—

Not you to me, but I betrayed by you. I that am honest, I that hold it sin To break the vow I am engaged in. I am betrayed by keeping company With men like you, men of inconstancy. When shall you see me write a thing in rhyme? Or groan for Joan? Or spend a minute’s time In pruning me? When shall you hear that I Will praise a hand, a foot, a face, an eye, A gait, a state, a brow, a breast, a waist, A leg, a limb—

Not you to me, but I betrayed by you. I that am honest, I that hold it sin To break the vow I am engaged in. I am betrayed by keeping company With men like you, men of inconstancy. When shall you see me write a thing in rhyme? Or groan for Joan? Or spend a minute’s time In pruning me? When shall you

not you to me, but i betrayed by you

Why it matters Berowne's righteous speech is self-consciously performative — and its content (a list of body parts he claims never to have praised) is the play's funniest setup for an interruption. The King cuts him off mid-catalogue.
KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

Soft! Whither away so fast?

A true man, or a thief, that gallops so?

Soft! Whither away so fast? A true man, or a thief, that gallops so?

Soft! Whither away so fast? A true man, or a thief, that gallops so?

soft

BEROWNE BEROWNE is expressing emotion.

I post from love. Good lover, let me go.

I post from love. Good lover, let me go.

I post from love. Good lover, let me go.

i post from love good lover, let me go

Enter Jaquenetta, with a letter, and Costard.
JAQUENETTA JAQUENETTA is speaking.

God bless the King!

God bless the King!

God bless the King!

god bless the king

KING KING is speaking.

What present hast thou there?

What present hast you thbefore?

What present hast you thbefore?

what present hast you thbefore

COSTARD COSTARD is speaking.

Some certain treason.

Some certain treason.

Some certain treason.

some certain treason

KING KING is speaking.

What makes treason here?

What makes treason hbefore?

What makes treason hbefore?

what makes treason hbefore

COSTARD COSTARD is objecting or denying.

Nay, it makes nothing, sir.

no, it makes nothing, sir.

no, it makes nothing, sir.

no, it makes nothing, sir

KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

If it mar nothing neither,

The treason and you go in peace away together.

If it mar nothing neither, The treason and you go in peace away together.

If it mar nothing neither, The treason and you go in peace away together.

if it mar nothing neither, the treason and you go in peace away together

JAQUENETTA ≋ verse JAQUENETTA is speaking with conviction.

I beseech your Grace, let this letter be read.

Our person misdoubts it; ’twas treason, he said.

I beseech your Grace, let this letter be read. Our person misdoubts it; ’twas treason, he said.

I beseech your Grace, let this letter be read. Our person misdoubts it; ’twas treason, he said.

i beseech your grace, let this letter be read

KING KING is speaking.

Berowne, read it over.

Berowne, read it over.

Berowne, read it over.

berowne, read it over

Why it matters The King asking Berowne to read his own letter is perfect structural irony—Berowne, who was just playing the role of superior observer, is now forced to read out his own exposure.
[_Berowne reads the letter._]
Where hadst thou it?
JAQUENETTA JAQUENETTA is speaking.

Of Costard.

Of Costard.

Of Costard.

of costard

KING KING is speaking.

Where hadst thou it?

Whbefore hadst you it?

Whbefore hadst you it?

whbefore hadst you it

COSTARD COSTARD is speaking.

Of Dun Adramadio, Dun Adramadio.

Of Dun Adramadio, Dun Adramadio.

Of Dun Adramadio, Dun Adramadio.

of dun adramadio, dun adramadio

[_Berowne tears the letter._]
KING KING is speaking.

How now, what is in you? Why dost thou tear it?

How now, what is in you? Why do you tear it?

How now, what's in you? Why do you tear it?

how now, what is in you why do you tear it

BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

A toy, my liege, a toy. Your Grace needs not fear it.

A toy, my liege, a toy. Your Grace needs not fear it.

A toy, my liege, a toy. Your Grace needs not fear it.

a toy, my liege, a toy

LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking with conviction.

It did move him to passion, and therefore let’s hear it.

It did move him to passion, and therefore let’s hear it.

It did move him to passion, and therefore let’s hear it.

it did move him to passion, and therefore let’s hear it

[_Picking up the pieces_.]
DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

It is Berowne’s writing, and here is his name.

It is Berowne’s writing, and hbefore is his name.

It is Berowne’s writing, and hbefore is his name.

it is berowne’s writing, and hbefore is his name

Why it matters The moment of complete exposure. Berowne has been caught by his own letter—the letter that exists because of Costard's delivery blunder. The irony is total.
[_To Costard_.] Ah, you whoreson loggerhead, you were born to do me
BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

shame.

Guilty, my lord, guilty. I confess, I confess.

shame. Guilty, my lord, guilty. I confess, I confess.

shame. Guilty, my lord, guilty. I confess, I confess.

shame

Why it matters Berowne's confession is immediate and total — and characteristically performed. Even in defeat, he keeps his rhetorical control: the double 'I confess' lands like a punchline.
KING What did you say?

What?

What?

What?

what?

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

That you three fools lacked me fool to make up the mess.

He, he, and you—and you, my liege—and I

Are pick-purses in love, and we deserve to die.

O, dismiss this audience, and I shall tell you more.

That you three fools lacked me fool to make up the mess. He, he, and you—and you, my liege—and I Are pick-purses in love, and we deserve to die. O, dismiss this audience, and I shall tell you more.

That you three fools lacked me fool to make up the mess. He, he, and you—and you, my liege—and I Are pick-purses in love, and we deserve to die. O, dismiss this audience, and I shall tell you more.

that you three fools lacked me fool to make up the mess

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

Now the number is even.

Now the number is even.

Now the number is even.

now the number is even

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

True, true, we are four.

Will these turtles be gone?

True, true, we are four. Will these turtles be gone?

True, true, we are four. Will these turtles be gone?

true, true, we are four

KING KING is speaking.

Hence, sirs, away!

Hence, sirs, away!

Hence, sirs, away!

hence, sirs, away

COSTARD COSTARD is speaking with conviction.

Walk aside the true folk, and let the traitors stay.

Walk aside the true folk, and let the traitors stay.

Walk aside the true folk, and let the traitors stay.

walk aside the true folk, and let the traitors stay

[_Exeunt Costard and Jaquenetta._]
BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Sweet lords, sweet lovers, O, let us embrace!

As true we are as flesh and blood can be.

The sea will ebb and flow, heaven show his face;

Young blood doth not obey an old decree.

We cannot cross the cause why we were born;

Therefore of all hands must we be forsworn.

Sweet lords, sweet lovers, O, let us embrace! As true we are as flesh and blood can be. The sea will ebb and flow, heaven show his face; Young blood does not obey an old decree. We cannot cross the cause why we were born; Therefore of all hands must we be forsworn.

Sweet lords, sweet lovers, O, let us embrace! As true we are as flesh and blood can be. The sea will ebb and flow, heaven show his face; Young blood does not obey an old decree. We cannot cross the cause why we were born; Therefore of all hands must we be forsworn.

sweet lords, sweet lovers, o, let us embrace

Why it matters Berowne pivots in an instant from mockery to solidarity. The turnaround is complete: having spent forty lines humiliating the others, he now embraces them as fellow sufferers. This pivot is psychologically realistic — the cruelty was a defense against his own admission. Now that it's forced, he drops the armor.
KING KING is speaking with conviction.

What, did these rent lines show some love of thine?

What, did these rent lines show some love of thine?

What, did these rent lines show some love of thine?

what, did these rent lines show some love of thine

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

“Did they?” quoth you? Who sees the heavenly Rosaline

That, like a rude and savage man of Ind,

At the first op’ning of the gorgeous east,

Bows not his vassal head and, strucken blind,

Kisses the base ground with obedient breast?

What peremptory eagle-sighted eye

Dares look upon the heaven of her brow

That is not blinded by her majesty?

“Did they?” quoth you? Who sees the heavenly Rosaline That, like a rude and savage man of Ind, At the first op’ning of the gorgeous east, Bows not his vassal head and, strucken blind, Kisses the base ground with obedient breast? What peremptory eagle-sighted eye Dares look upon the heaven of her brow That is not blinded by her majesty?

“Did they?” quoth you? Who sees the heavenly Rosaline That, like a rude and savage man of Ind, At the first op’ning of the gorgeous east, Bows not his vassal head and, strucken blind, Kisses the base ground with obedient breast? What peremptory eagle-sighted eye Dares look upon the heaven of her bro

“did they

Why it matters Berowne's praise of Rosaline in this passage is more extravagant than anything the King, Longaville, or Dumaine said about their ladies. The man who was just mocking them is now the most rapturous of all four. Shakespeare is showing us how completely the satirist has been captured.
KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

What zeal, what fury hath inspired thee now?

My love, her mistress, is a gracious moon;

She, an attending star, scarce seen a light.

What zeal, what fury has inspired you now? My love, her mistress, is a gracious moon; She, an attending star, scarce seen a light.

What zeal, what fury has inspired you now? My love, her mistress, is a gracious moon; She, an attending star, scarce seen a light.

what zeal, what fury has inspired you now

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

My eyes are then no eyes, nor I Berowne.

O, but for my love, day would turn to night!

Of all complexions the culled sovereignty

Do meet as at a fair in her fair cheek,

Where several worthies make one dignity,

Where nothing wants that want itself doth seek.

Lend me the flourish of all gentle tongues—

Fie, painted rhetoric! O, she needs it not.

To things of sale a seller’s praise belongs.

She passes praise; then praise too short doth blot.

A withered hermit, five-score winters worn,

Might shake off fifty, looking in her eye.

Beauty doth varnish age, as if new born,

And gives the crutch the cradle’s infancy.

O, ’tis the sun that maketh all things shine!

My eyes are then no eyes, nor I Berowne. O, but for my love, day would turn to night! Of all complexions the culled sovereignty Do meet as at a fair in her fair cheek, Where several worthies make one dignity, Where nothing wants that want itself does seek. Lend me the flourish of all gentle tongues— Fie, painted rhetoric! O, she needs it not. To things of sale a seller’s praise belongs. She passes praise; then praise too short does blot. A withered hermit, five-score winters worn, Might shake off fifty, looking in her eye. Beauty does varnish age, as if new born, And gives the crutch the cradle’s infancy. O, ’tis the sun that maketh all things shine!

My eyes are then no eyes, nor I Berowne. O, but for my love, day would turn to night! Of all complexions the culled sovereignty Do meet as at a fair in her fair cheek, Where several worthies make one dignity, Where nothing wants that want itself does seek. Lend me the flourish of all gentle tongues—

my eyes are then no eyes, nor i berowne

KING KING is expressing emotion.

By heaven, thy love is black as ebony.

By heaven, your love is black as ebony.

By heaven, your love is black as ebony.

by heaven, your love is black as ebony

Why it matters The King's jibe about Rosaline's dark complexion triggers Berowne's astonishing defense of dark beauty — one of the play's most original passages.
BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Is ebony like her? O word divine!

A wife of such wood were felicity.

O, who can give an oath? Where is a book?

That I may swear beauty doth beauty lack

If that she learn not of her eye to look.

No face is fair that is not full so black.

Is ebony like her? O word divine! A wife of such wood were felicity. O, who can give an oath? Where is a book? That I may swear beauty does beauty lack If that she learn not of her eye to look. No face is fair that is not full so black.

Is ebony like her? O word divine! A wife of such wood were felicity. O, who can give an oath? Where is a book? That I may swear beauty does beauty lack If that she learn not of her eye to look. No face is fair that is not full so black.

is ebony like her

KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

O paradox! Black is the badge of hell,

The hue of dungeons and the school of night;

And beauty’s crest becomes the heavens well.

O paradox! Black is the badge of hell, The hue of dungeons and the school of night; And beauty’s crest becomes the heavens well.

O paradox! Black is the badge of hell, The hue of dungeons and the school of night; And beauty’s crest becomes the heavens well.

o paradox

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Devils soonest tempt, resembling spirits of light.

O, if in black my lady’s brows be decked,

It mourns that painting and usurping hair

Should ravish doters with a false aspect;

And therefore is she born to make black fair.

Her favour turns the fashion of the days,

For native blood is counted painting now;

And therefore red, that would avoid dispraise,

Paints itself black, to imitate her brow.

Devils soonest tempt, resembling spirits of light. O, if in black my lady’s brows be decked, It mourns that painting and usurping hair Should ravish doters with a false aspect; And therefore is she born to make black fair. Her favour turns the fashion of the days, For native blood is counted painting now; And therefore red, that would avoid dispraise, Paints itself black, to imitate her brow.

Devils soonest tempt, resembling spirits of light. O, if in black my lady’s brows be decked, It mourns that painting and usurping hair Should ravish doters with a false aspect; And therefore is she born to make black fair. Her favour turns the fashion of the days, For native blood is counted paintin

devils soonest tempt, resembling spirits of light

Why it matters Berowne's defense of dark beauty is the play's most philosophically sophisticated argument—and it's made in the service of love-rationalization. Whether Shakespeare means it as genuine counter-cultural aesthetics or as brilliant sophistry-in-action is deliberately unclear.
DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

To look like her are chimney-sweepers black.

To look like her are chimney-sweepers black.

To look like her are chimney-sweepers black.

to look like her are chimney-sweepers black

LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking.

And since her time are colliers counted bright.

And since her time are colliers counted bright.

And since her time are colliers counted bright.

and since her time are colliers counted bright

KING KING is speaking.

And Ethiopes of their sweet complexion crack.

And Ethiopes of their sweet complexion crack.

And Ethiopes of their sweet complexion crack.

and ethiopes of their sweet complexion crack

DUMAINE DUMAINE is objecting or denying.

Dark needs no candles now, for dark is light.

Dark needs no candles now, for dark is light.

Dark needs no candles now, for dark is light.

dark needs no candles now, for dark is light

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Your mistresses dare never come in rain,

For fear their colours should be washed away.

Your mistresses dare never come in rain, For fear their colours should be washed away.

Your mistresses dare never come in rain, For fear their colours should be washed away.

your mistresses dare never come in rain, for fear their colours should be washed away

KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

’Twere good yours did; for, sir, to tell you plain,

I’ll find a fairer face not washed today.

’Twere good yours did; for, sir, to tell you plain, I’ll find a fairer face not washed today.

’Twere good yours did; for, sir, to tell you plain, I’ll find a fairer face not washed today.

’twere good yours did; for, sir, to tell you plain, i’ll find a fairer face not washed today

BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking.

I’ll prove her fair, or talk till doomsday here.

I’ll prove her fair, or talk till doomsday hbefore.

I’ll prove her fair, or talk till doomsday hbefore.

i’ll prove her fair, or talk till doomsday hbefore

KING KING is speaking.

No devil will fright thee then so much as she.

No devil will fright you then so much as she.

No devil gonna fright you then so much as she.

no devil will fright you then so much as she

DUMAINE DUMAINE is objecting or denying.

I never knew man hold vile stuff so dear.

I never knew man hold vile stuff so dear.

I never knew man hold vile stuff so dear.

i never knew man hold vile stuff so dear

[_Showing his shoe_.]
LONGAVILLE LONGAVILLE is speaking.

Look, here’s thy love, my foot and her face see.

Look, hbefore’s your love, my foot and her face see.

Look, hbefore’s your love, my foot and her face see.

look, hbefore’s your love, my foot and her face see

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

O, if the streets were paved with thine eyes,

Her feet were much too dainty for such tread.

O, if the streets were paved with thine eyes, Her feet were much too dainty for such tread.

O, if the streets were paved with thine eyes, Her feet were much too dainty for such tread.

o, if the streets were paved with thine eyes, her feet were much too dainty for such tread

DUMAINE ≋ verse DUMAINE is speaking with conviction.

O vile! Then, as she goes, what upward lies

The street should see as she walked over head.

O vile! Then, as she goes, what upward lies The street should see as she walked over head.

O vile! Then, as she goes, what upward lies The street should see as she walked over head.

o vile

KING KING is objecting or denying.

But what of this? Are we not all in love?

But what of this? Are we not all in love?

But what of this? Are we not all in love?

but what of this are we not all in love

BEROWNE BEROWNE is speaking.

Nothing so sure, and thereby all forsworn.

Nothing so sure, and thereby all forsworn.

Nothing so sure, and thereby all forsworn.

nothing so sure, and thereby all forsworn

KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

Then leave this chat, and, good Berowne, now prove

Our loving lawful, and our faith not torn.

Then leave this chat, and, good Berowne, now prove Our loving lawful, and our faith not torn.

Then leave this chat, and, good Berowne, now prove Our loving lawful, and our faith not torn.

then leave this chat, and, good berowne, now prove our loving lawful, and our faith not torn

Why it matters The King explicitly commissions Berowne to construct a philosophical defense of oath-breaking. This sets up the great speech directly: Berowne is being asked to perform rhetorical magic, not to discover truth.
DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

Ay, marry, there; some flattery for this evil.

Ay, indeed, thbefore; some flattery for this evil.

Ay, indeed, thbefore; some flattery for this evil.

ay, indeed, thbefore; some flattery for this evil

LONGAVILLE ≋ verse LONGAVILLE is speaking with conviction.

O, some authority how to proceed.

Some tricks, some quillets, how to cheat the devil.

O, some authority how to proceed. Some tricks, some quillets, how to cheat the devil.

O, some authority how to proceed. Some tricks, some quillets, how to cheat the devil.

o, some authority how to proceed

DUMAINE DUMAINE is speaking.

Some salve for perjury.

Some salve for perjury.

Some salve for perjury.

some salve for perjury

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

O, ’tis more than need.

Have at you, then, affection’s men-at-arms.

Consider what you first did swear unto:

To fast, to study, and to see no woman—

Flat treason ’gainst the kingly state of youth.

Say, can you fast? Your stomachs are too young,

And abstinence engenders maladies.

O, we have made a vow to study, lords,

And in that vow we have forsworn our books;

For when would you, my liege, or you, or you,

In leaden contemplation have found out

Such fiery numbers as the prompting eyes

Of beauty’s tutors have enriched you with?

Other slow arts entirely keep the brain,

And therefore, finding barren practisers,

Scarce show a harvest of their heavy toil;

But love, first learned in a lady’s eyes,

Lives not alone immured in the brain,

But with the motion of all elements

Courses as swift as thought in every power,

And gives to every power a double power,

Above their functions and their offices.

It adds a precious seeing to the eye.

A lover’s eyes will gaze an eagle blind.

A lover’s ear will hear the lowest sound,

When the suspicious head of theft is stopped.

Love’s feeling is more soft and sensible

Than are the tender horns of cockled snails.

Love’s tongue proves dainty Bacchus gross in taste.

For valour, is not Love a Hercules,

Still climbing trees in the Hesperides?

Subtle as Sphinx, as sweet and musical

As bright Apollo’s lute, strung with his hair.

And when Love speaks, the voice of all the gods

Make heaven drowsy with the harmony.

Never durst poet touch a pen to write

Until his ink were tempered with Love’s sighs.

O, then his lines would ravish savage ears

And plant in tyrants mild humility.

From women’s eyes this doctrine I derive.

They sparkle still the right Promethean fire;

They are the books, the arts, the academes,

That show, contain, and nourish, all the world;

Else none at all in aught proves excellent.

Then fools you were these women to forswear,

Or, keeping what is sworn, you will prove fools.

For wisdom’s sake, a word that all men love,

Or for love’s sake, a word that loves all men,

Or for men’s sake, the authors of these women,

Or women’s sake, by whom we men are men,

Let us once lose our oaths to find ourselves,

Or else we lose ourselves to keep our oaths.

It is religion to be thus forsworn,

For charity itself fulfils the law,

And who can sever love from charity?

O, ’tis more than need. Have at you, then, affection’s men-at-arms. Consider what you first did swear unto: To fast, to study, and to see no woman— Flat treason ’gainst the kingly state of youth. Say, can you fast? Your stomachs are too young, And abstinence engenders maladies. O, we have made a vow to study, lords, And in that vow we have forsworn our books; For when would you, my liege, or you, or you, In leaden contemplation have found out Such fiery numbers as the prompting eyes Of beauty’s tutors have enriched you with? Other slow ares entirely keep the brain, And therefore, finding barren practisers, Scarce show a harvest of their heavy toil; But love, first learned in a lady’s eyes, Lives not alone immured in the brain, But with the motion of all elements Courses as swift as yought in every power, And gives to every power a double power, Above their functions and their offices. It adds a precious seeing to the eye. A lover’s eyes will gaze an eagle blind. A lover’s ear will hear the lowest sound, When the suspicious head of theft is stopped. Love’s feeling is more soft and sensible Than are the tender horns of cockled snails. Love’s tongue proves dainty Bacchus gross in taste. For valour, is not Love a Hercules, Still climbing trees in the Hesperides? Subtle as Sphinx, as sweet and musical As bright Apollo’s lute, strung with his hair. And when Love speaks, the voice of all the gods Make heaven drowsy with the harmony. Never durst poet touch a pen to write Until his ink were tempered with Love’s sighs. O, then his lines would ravish savage ears And plant in tyrants mild humility. From women’s eyes this doctrine I derive. They sparkle still the right Promethean fire; They are the books, the ares, the academes, That show, contain, and nourish, all the world; Else none at all in aught proves excellent. Then fools you were these women to forswear, Or, keeping what is sworn, you will prove fools. For wisdom’s sake, a word that all men love, Or for love’s sake, a word that loves all men, Or for men’s sake, the authors of these women, Or women’s sake, by whom we men are men, Let us once lose our oaths to find ourselves, Or else we lose ourselves to keep our oaths. It is religion to be thus forsworn, For charity itself fulfils the law, And who can sever love from charity?

O, ’tis more than need. Have at you, then, affection’s men-at-arms. Consider what you first did swear unto: To fast, to study, and to see no woman— Flat treason ’gainst the kingly state of youth. Say, can you fast? Your stomachs are too young, And abstinence engenders maladies. O, we have made a vow

o, ’tis more than need

""
""
Why it matters This is one of the most remarkable speeches in all of Shakespeare's comedies: nearly 60 lines of sustained philosophical argument, brilliant sophistry, and genuine feeling simultaneously. It is constructed as an oration — with a logical premise, evidence from physiology and mythology and theology, and a peroration. It is also completely wrong as argument: the premise (love teaches more than books) is a rationalization for doing what they wanted anyway. But it is not wholly wrong as poetry. Shakespeare lets the speech be both things — convincing performance and exposed self-interest.
KING KING is speaking.

Saint Cupid, then, and, soldiers, to the field!

Saint Cupid, then, and, soldiers, to the field!

Saint Cupid, then, and, soldiers, to the field!

saint cupid, then, and, soldiers, to the field

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

Advance your standards, and upon them, lords!

Pell-mell, down with them! But be first advised

In conflict that you get the sun of them.

Advance your standards, and upon them, lords! Pell-mell, down with them! But be first advised In conflict that you get the sun of them.

Advance your standards, and upon them, lords! Pell-mell, down with them! But be first advised In conflict that you get the sun of them.

advance your standards, and upon them, lords

LONGAVILLE ≋ verse LONGAVILLE is speaking with conviction.

Now to plain dealing. Lay these glozes by.

Shall we resolve to woo these girls of France?

Now to plain dealing. Lay these glozes by. Shall we resolve to woo these girls of France?

Now to plain dealing. Lay these glozes by. Shall we resolve to woo these girls of France?

now to plain dealing

KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

And win them too. Therefore let us devise

Some entertainment for them in their tents.

And win them too. Therefore let us devise Some entertainment for them in their tents.

And win them too. Therefore let us devise Some entertainment for them in their tents.

and win them too

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

First, from the park let us conduct them thither.

Then homeward every man attach the hand

Of his fair mistress. In the afternoon

We will with some strange pastime solace them,

Such as the shortness of the time can shape;

For revels, dances, masques, and merry hours

Forerun fair Love, strewing her way with flowers.

First, from the park let us conduct them thither. Then homeward every man attach the hand Of his fair mistress. In the afternoon We will with some strange pastime solace them, Such as the shortness of the time can shape; For revels, dances, masques, and merry hours Forerun fair Love, strewing her way with flowers.

First, from the park let us conduct them thither. Then homeward every man attach the hand Of his fair mistress. In the afternoon We will with some strange pastime solace them, Such as the shortness of the time can shape; For revels, dances, masques, and merry hours Forerun fair Love, strewing her wa

first, from the park let us conduct them thither

Why it matters Berowne's plan — the masque — is what produces the Russian-disguise disaster of 5-2. The hasty courtship planning (whatever the shortness of time can shape) leads directly to the amateur theatrics that Boyet will spy on and the ladies will outwit.
KING ≋ verse KING is speaking with conviction.

Away, away! No time shall be omitted

That will betime and may by us be fitted.

Away, away! No time shall be omitted That will betime and may by us be fitted.

Away, away! No time shall be omitted That will betime and may by us be fitted.

away, away

BEROWNE ≋ verse BEROWNE is speaking with conviction.

_Allons! allons!_ Sowed cockle reaped no corn,

And justice always whirls in equal measure.

Light wenches may prove plagues to men forsworn;

If so, our copper buys no better treasure.

_Allons! allons!_ Sowed cockle reaped no corn, And justice always whirls in equal measure. Light wenches may prove plagues to men forsworn; If so, our copper buys no better treasure.

_Allons! allons!_ Sowed cockle reaped no corn, And justice always whirls in equal measure. Light wenches may prove plagues to men forsworn; If so, our copper buys no better treasure.

_allons

Why it matters Berowne's exit lines quietly subvert the triumphal tone of his great speech. He has just argued that love is the highest form of religion—and now he wonders if the women they love might be their punishment. This ambivalence is characteristic: he never wholly commits, never quite believes his own performances. It's what makes him the most interesting man in the play.
[_Exeunt._]

The Reckoning

This is the structural and comedic centerpiece of the whole play. The eavesdropping geometry—observer-inside-observer-inside-observer—is perfectly engineered: each man believes himself the knowing outsider while being caught himself. Berowne's great pro-love speech, which runs nearly forty lines, is the play's philosophical climax: it argues that women's eyes are the true books, the real academes. It's also a magnificent piece of sophistry—self-serving rationalization dressed as transcendent wisdom—and Shakespeare lets us enjoy both things simultaneously.

If this happened today…

Four guys in the same friend group have all secretly started texting the same group of women they promised each other they'd avoid. Each one discovers another's messages but doesn't confess his own—until one person's DM history gets forwarded to the whole group chat. Then the most articulate one stands up and delivers a TED talk about why falling in love was actually the most intellectual thing they could have done.

Continue to 5.1 →