Julia speaks with passionate conviction and constant self-contradiction — she says one thing and immediately does another, then scolds herself for it. Watch for her habit of performing indifference and then dropping it the moment she's alone.
But say, Lucetta, now we are alone,
Wouldst thou then counsel me to fall in love?
Tell me, Lucetta—now that we're alone, what do you think of the men who visit here?
Okay, now that it's just us, real talk. What do you think about all these guys coming around?
so like what do you actually think about these men
Lucetta delivers her sharpest opinions in rhyming couplets — she's witty and efficient, saying much in few words, and often letting a single line expose the ridiculousness of Julia's self-deception. Watch for how her brevity does more damage than any long speech.
Ay, madam, so you stumble not unheedfully.
Yes, madam, as long as you're not careless in what you say.
Sure, as long as you don't slip up.
yeah just be careful don't say something dumb
Of all the fair resort of gentlemen
That every day with parle encounter me,
In thy opinion which is worthiest love?
Of all the handsome men who come here, which ones do you like?
Out of all these good-looking guys, who's your favorite?
of all these hot guys which ones do you like
Please you, repeat their names, I’ll show my mind
According to my shallow simple skill.
If you'll tell me their names, I'll give you my honest opinion of each.
If you name them, I'll tell you what I think about each one.
list them out and i'll give you my real opinion
What think’st thou of the fair Sir Eglamour?
What's your opinion of the handsome Sir Eglamour?
Okay, what about Sir Eglamour? The good-looking one?
what about sir eglamour
As of a knight well-spoken, neat, and fine;
But, were I you, he never should be mine.
He's well-educated, neat in appearance, and refined.
He's smart, he looks nice, he's got good manners.
he's well-spoken good-looking refined
What think’st thou of the rich Mercatio?
What about the wealthy Mercatio?
What about Mercatio? The rich guy?
what about mercatio
Well of his wealth; but of himself, so-so.
His money is impressive. As for him personally, he's just mediocre.
Rich, yeah. But the guy himself? Meh.
money's good but he's so-so
What think’st thou of the gentle Proteus?
What's your opinion of the kind Proteus?
Okay, what about Proteus? The nice one?
what about proteus
Lord, Lord, to see what folly reigns in us!
Lord, madam, I've heard him called a virtuous man.
Um, I've heard people say he's a good person.
i've heard he's good virtuous
How now? What means this passion at his name?
And I've heard that, too. But what do you think of his character? Is his virtue genuine?
Yeah, same. But what do you actually think? Like, is he for real?
yeah ok but do you think he's actually good or just acting
Pardon, dear madam, ’tis a passing shame
That I, unworthy body as I am,
Should censure thus on lovely gentlemen.
I think he's genuine. But people's opinions change—he could change too.
I think he's real. But you never know—people can change.
i think he's genuine but people change so
Why not on Proteus, as of all the rest?
People certainly do change. And if I fell for someone, wouldn't that be foolish?
Right, they do. And if I caught feelings for someone? That would be stupid.
yeah and if i liked someone that would be dumb
Then thus: of many good I think him best.
It wouldn't be foolish. It's foolish not to love when you find someone worth loving.
It's not dumb. It's dumb not to fall for someone if they're worth it.
nah it's not dumb it's dumb to ignore someone who's good
Your reason?
But none of them are special enough to deserve my love.
But none of these guys are good enough for me.
but none of them are worth my time
I have no other but a woman’s reason:
I think him so because I think him so.
A woman just knows these things—there's no other reason for it.
Honestly? Women's intuition. No real logic to it.
women's reason no explanation just know
And wouldst thou have me cast my love on him?
Lucetta, stop. You're contradicting yourself.
Lucetta, stop it. You're being annoying.
lucetta stop
Ay, if you thought your love not cast away.
I'm just answering your questions. You brought up every complaint.
I'm just saying what you asked me. You brought this up.
i'm answering you you started this
Why, he of all the rest hath never moved me.
You're enjoying this. You came here ready to defend someone.
You like this. You came in here wanting to argue for someone.
you like this you were ready to argue for someone
Yet he of all the rest I think best loves ye.
Maybe I did. What does that matter?
Maybe I did. So what?
maybe i did so what
His little speaking shows his love but small.
Let's discuss someone else. I don't want to talk about him.
Can we talk about someone else? I'm done with this.
change the subject i don't want to talk about him
Fire that’s closest kept burns most of all.
Of course, whatever you wish.
Fine, whatever.
sure
They do not love that do not show their love.
Besides, people who don't show their love don't really love at all.
Also, if you're in love, you have to actually show it. That's real love.
and another thing if you love someone you show it that's how we know it's real
O, they love least that let men know their love.
But girls aren't supposed to show their feelings—it's not proper. We say no when we mean yes, and men have to keep asking until we say yes and mean it.
But we're supposed to hide it. That's how it works. We play hard to get, guys keep trying, and eventually we say yes.
but girls are supposed to hide it it's proper we say no and mean yes guys keep asking until they win
I would I knew his mind.
You're right. Some people follow the rules too strictly.
Yeah, maybe. Some people take it too far.
maybe people take it too seriously
Peruse this paper, madam.
Let me get a book to read.
Let me grab a book. That'll help.
i'll get a book
Julia's elaborate performance of rejection is not hypocrisy in the modern sense — it's following the social script of her era. A well-bred woman in Elizabethan England was expected to refuse letters, express shock at being courted, and only accept love after appropriate resistance. This performance protected her reputation. Julia even names the rule herself: 'maids in modesty say No to that / Which they would have the profferer construe Ay.' The system required women to say no and men to keep asking. It was designed to protect women from social censure — but it also, as Julia notices, leaves them tearing up letters they desperately wanted to keep. Shakespeare gives Julia enough self-awareness to see the absurdity of the game she's required to play.
_To Julia_—Say, from whom?
Here. A message for you. I found it—someone slipped it to me.
Actually, here. Someone gave me this for you.
wait actually someone gave me this for you
That the contents will show.
A message? For me? I don't want it. Who sent it? I'm not interested.
For me? No. I don't want it. Who's it from? I don't care.
for me no who sent it i don't want to know
Say, say, who gave it thee?
It's from Proteus, madam.
It's from Proteus.
it's from proteus
Sir Valentine’s page, and sent, I think, from Proteus.
He would have given it you, but I, being in the way,
Did in your name receive it. Pardon the fault, I pray.
Why would he send me a letter?
Why would he... I mean, what does it say?
why would he what's in it
Now, by my modesty, a goodly broker!
Dare you presume to harbour wanton lines?
To whisper and conspire against my youth?
Now trust me, ’tis an office of great worth,
And you an officer fit for the place.
There, take the paper; see it be returned,
Or else return no more into my sight.
You'll have to read it yourself.
You have to read it yourself.
read it yourself
To plead for love deserves more fee than hate.
I won't. Give it back. I don't want to read it.
No. Give it to me. No, I mean—take it back.
no give it back i don't want it
Will ye be gone?
Here, take it.
Here.
here
That you may ruminate.
Why did you give it to me? I said I didn't want it. What are you trying to do?
Why did you give it to me? You know I didn't want it. What's the point of this?
why did you i said i didn't want it what are you doing
And yet I would I had o’erlooked the letter.
It were a shame to call her back again
And pray her to a fault for which I chid her.
What fool is she, that knows I am a maid
And would not force the letter to my view,
Since maids in modesty say “No” to that
Which they would have the profferer construe “Ay”.
Fie, fie, how wayward is this foolish love
That like a testy babe will scratch the nurse
And presently, all humbled, kiss the rod!
How churlishly I chid Lucetta hence,
When willingly I would have had her here!
How angerly I taught my brow to frown,
When inward joy enforced my heart to smile!
My penance is to call Lucetta back
And ask remission for my folly past.
What ho! Lucetta!
I don't care what he thinks. I'm going to tear this up. I won't read it.
I don't care. I'm gonna rip this up. Not reading it.
i don't care i'm tearing it up not reading it
What would your ladyship?
Madam, what did you just do?
What did you just do?
what are you doing
Is ’t near dinner time?
What I should have done before. I won't be made a fool of by some man's games.
What I should've done. I won't let him play with me.
what i should have done i won't be played i won't be made a fool
I would it were,
That you might kill your stomach on your meat
And not upon your maid.
Oh no. What have I done? Lucetta, help me. I destroyed it. My name—I can see my name in the pieces.
Oh my god. What did I do? Lucetta, help. I can see my name on these pieces.
oh no what did i do i can see my name on the pieces
What is’t that you took up so gingerly?
Can you read any of it? What does his writing say? Is that his hand? Oh, look at my name.
Can you see what it says? Is that his handwriting? Oh god, there's my name.
what does it say is that his writing oh there's my name my name is here
Nothing.
Yes, that's his handwriting. Calm yourself.
Yeah, that's him. Relax.
that's his writing calm down
Why didst thou stoop, then?
But what was he saying? What's this word? Can you make it out? Did he say he loves me?
What's he saying though? What's this? Did he say he loves me?
but what did he say what's this word did he say he loves me
To take a paper up that I let fall.
You destroyed it. You'll never know now.
You ripped it up. You're not gonna know.
you destroyed it you won't know
And is that paper nothing?
I know. That's what makes it unbearable. I want to know what he wrote. I want to read it. Lucetta, what have you done to me?
I know. And I hate it. I want to know what he said. I want to read it so badly. This is torture.
i know and i hate it i want to know what he said why did you give it to me
Nothing concerning me.
I destroyed the letter but I can't destroy my longing for him. This is what dying is like.
I tore it up but I can't tear up how I feel. This is torture.
i destroyed his letter but not my feelings this is torture this is dying
Then let it lie for those that it concerns.
Is that his name? Look, there—'Proteus.' His name is on this scrap.
There's his name. 'Proteus.' It's right here on this piece.
his name proteus right here
Madam, it will not lie where it concerns,
Unless it have a false interpreter.
I'll keep this. Even if I tore up the rest, I can at least keep his name.
I'm keeping this. I tore up the letter but I get to keep his name.
i'm keeping this it has his name i get to keep proteus
Some love of yours hath writ to you in rhyme.
And here's my name. His name and my name, together on two different scraps. I separated them. Now I hate myself more than I hate him.
And here's my name. I tore his name apart from mine. I destroyed us.
and there's my name i ripped his name away from mine i destroyed us i hate myself
That I might sing it, madam, to a tune.
Give me a note. Your ladyship can set—
I'll destroy my part. Keep his. His name deserves better than mine.
I'll get rid of mine. Let him keep his. His name is better than mine.
i'll destroy my name let him keep his his name is better
As little by such toys as may be possible.
Best sing it to the tune of “Light o’ Love”.
(She stamps on her name.) There. I hope I never get his love. I don't deserve it.
(She steps on her name.) I don't deserve him.
*stamps on my name* i don't deserve him
Torn letters are a recurring motif in early Shakespeare — in this play alone, letters are torn, intercepted, misdelivered, and written anonymously. The torn-letter scene here is comic and touching: Julia destroys the thing she most wants and then picks up the pieces literally. But notice what she does with the fragments: she separates her name from Proteus's name, stamps on her own, and cherishes his. There's something psychologically precise here — she knows she's punishing herself by throwing away the letter, so she punishes only the version of herself that was too cold. The scene prefigures the entire play's drama: people who hurt the ones who love them, often including themselves.
It is too heavy for so light a tune.
I love him. That's the real truth. I've been in love with him all along.
I love him. That's all there is. I've loved him the whole time.
i love him that's it the whole truth i always did
Heavy? Belike it hath some burden then?
Heavy? Belike it has some burden then?
heavy? belike it has some burden then?
heavy? belike it hath some burden then?
Ay, and melodious were it, would you sing it.
Ay, and melodious were it, would you sing it.
ay, and melodious were it, would you sing it.
ay, and melodious were it, would you sing it.
And why not you?
And why not you?
and why not you?
and why not you?
I cannot reach so high.
I cannot reach so high.
i cannot reach so high.
i cannot reach so high.
Let’s see your song. [_Taking the letter_.]
How now, minion!
Let’s see your song. [_Taking the letter_.] How now, minion!
let’s see your song. [_taking the letter_.] how now, minion!
let’s see your song. [_taking the letter_.] how now, minion!
Keep tune there still, so you will sing it out.
And yet methinks I do not like this tune.
Keep tune there still, so you will sing it out. And yet methinks I do not like this tune.
keep tune there still, so you will sing it out. and yet methinks i do not like this tune.
keep tune there still, so you will sing it out. and yet methinks i do not like this tune.
You do not?
You do not?
you do not?
you do not?
No, madam, it is too sharp.
No, madam, it is too sharp.
no, madam, it is too sharp.
no, madam, it is too sharp.
You, minion, are too saucy.
You, minion, are too saucy.
you, minion, are too saucy.
you, minion, are too saucy.
Nay, now you are too flat
And mar the concord with too harsh a descant.
There wanteth but a mean to fill your song.
Nay, now you are too flat And mar the concord with too harsh a descant. There wanteth but a mean to fill your song.
nay, now you are too flat and mar the concord with too harsh a descant. there wanteth but a mean to fill your song.
nay, now you are too flat and mar the concord with too harsh a descant. there wanteth but a mean to fill your song.
The mean is drowned with your unruly bass.
The mean is drowned with your unruly bass.
the mean is drowned with your unruly bass.
the mean is drowned with your unruly bass.
Indeed, I bid the base for Proteus.
Indeed, I bid the base for Proteus.
indeed, i bid the base for proteus.
indeed, i bid the base for proteus.
This babble shall not henceforth trouble me.
Here is a coil with protestation! [_Tears the letter_.]
Go, get you gone, and let the papers lie.
You would be fingering them to anger me.
This babble shall not henceforth trouble me. Here is a coil with protestation! [_Tears the letter_.] Go, get you gone, and let the papers lie. You would be fingering them to anger me.
this babble shall not henceforth trouble me. here is a coil with protestation! [_tears the letter_.] go, get you gone, and let the papers lie. you would be fingering them to anger me.
this babble shall not henceforth trouble me. here is a coil with protestation! [_tears the letter_.] go, get you gone, and let the papers lie. you would be fingering them to anger me.
She makes it strange, but she would be best pleased
To be so angered with another letter.
She makes it strange, but she would be best pleased To be so angered with another letter.
she makes it strange, but she would be best pleased to be so angered with another letter.
she makes it strange, but she would be best pleased to be so angered with another letter.
Nay, would I were so angered with the same!
O hateful hands, to tear such loving words!
Injurious wasps, to feed on such sweet honey
And kill the bees that yield it with your stings!
I’ll kiss each several paper for amends.
Look, here is writ _kind Julia_. Unkind Julia!
As in revenge of thy ingratitude,
I throw thy name against the bruising stones,
Trampling contemptuously on thy disdain.
And here is writ _love-wounded Proteus_.
Poor wounded name, my bosom as a bed
Shall lodge thee till thy wound be throughly healed;
And thus I search it with a sovereign kiss.
But twice or thrice was _Proteus_ written down.
Be calm, good wind, blow not a word away
Till I have found each letter in the letter
Except mine own name. That some whirlwind bear
Unto a ragged, fearful, hanging rock,
And throw it thence into the raging sea.
Lo, here in one line is his name twice writ:
_Poor forlorn Proteus, passionate Proteus,
To the sweet Julia._ That I’ll tear away;
And yet I will not, sith so prettily
He couples it to his complaining names.
Thus will I fold them one upon another.
Now kiss, embrace, contend, do what you will.
Nay, would I were so angered with the same! O hateful hands, to tear such loving words! Injurious wasps, to feed on such sweet honey And kill the bees that yield it with your stings! I’ll kiss each several paper for amends. Look, here is writ _kind Julia_. Unkind Julia! As in revenge of your ingratitude, I throw your name against the bruising stones, Trampling contemptuously on your disdain. And here is writ _love-wounded Proteus_. Poor wounded name, my bosom as a bed Shall lodge you till your wound be throughly healed; And thus I search it with a sovereign kiss. But twice or thrice was _Proteus_ written down. Be calm, good wind, blow not a word away Till I have found each letter in the letter Except mine own name. That some whirlwind bear Unto a ragged, fearful, hanging rock, And throw it thence into the raging sea. Lo, here in one line is his name twice writ: _Poor forlorn Proteus, passionate Proteus, To the sweet Julia._ That I’ll tear away; And yet I will not, sith so prettily He couples it to his complaining names. Thus will I fold them one upon another. Now kiss, embrace, contend, do what you will.
nay, would i were so angered with the same! o hateful hands, to tear such loving words! injurious wasps, to feed on such sweet honey and kill the bees that yield it with your stings! i’ll kiss each several paper for amends. look, here is writ _kind julia_. unkind julia! as in revenge of your ingratitude, i throw your name against the bruising stones, trampling contemptuously on your disdain. and here is writ _love-wounded proteus_. poor wounded name, my bosom as a bed shall lodge you till your wound be throughly healed; and thus i search it with a sovereign kiss. but twice or thrice was _proteus_ written down. be calm, good wind, blow not a word away till i have found each letter in the letter except mine own name. that some whirlwind bear unto a ragged, fearful, hanging rock, and throw it thence into the raging sea. lo, here in one line is his name twice writ: _poor forlorn proteus, passionate proteus, to the sweet julia._ that i’ll tear away; and yet i will not, sith so prettily he couples it to his complaining names. thus will i fold them one upon another. now kiss, embrace, contend, do what you will.
nay, would i were so angered with the same! o hateful hands, to tear such loving words! injurious wasps, to feed on such sweet honey and kill the bees that yield it with your stings! i’ll kiss each several paper for amends. look, here is writ _kind julia_. unkind julia! as in revenge of thy ingratitude, i throw thy name against the bruising stones, trampling contemptuously on thy disdain. and here is writ _love-wounded proteus_. poor wounded name, my bosom as a bed shall lodge thee till thy wound be throughly healed; and thus i search it with a sovereign kiss. but twice or thrice was _proteus_ written down. be calm, good wind, blow not a word away till i have found each letter in the letter except mine own name. that some whirlwind bear unto a ragged, fearful, hanging rock, and throw it thence into the raging sea. lo, here in one line is his name twice writ: _poor forlorn proteus, passionate proteus, to the sweet julia._ that i’ll tear away; and yet i will not, sith so prettily he couples it to his complaining names. thus will i fold them one upon another. now kiss, embrace, contend, do what you will.
Madam, dinner is ready, and your father stays.
Madam, dinner is ready, and your father stays.
madam, dinner is ready, and your father stays.
madam, dinner is ready, and your father stays.
Well, let us go.
Well, let us go.
well, let us go.
well, let us go.
What, shall these papers lie like tell-tales here?
What, shall these papers lie like tell-tales here?
what, shall these papers lie like tell-tales here?
what, shall these papers lie like tell-tales here?
If you respect them, best to take them up.
If you respect them, best to take them up.
if you respect them, best to take them up.
if you respect them, best to take them up.
Nay, I was taken up for laying them down.
Yet here they shall not lie, for catching cold.
Nay, I was taken up for laying them down. Yet here they shall not lie, for catching cold.
nay, i was taken up for laying them down. yet here they shall not lie, for catching cold.
nay, i was taken up for laying them down. yet here they shall not lie, for catching cold.
I see you have a month’s mind to them.
I see you have a month’s mind to them.
i see you have a month’s mind to them.
i see you have a month’s mind to them.
Ay, madam, you may say what sights you see;
I see things too, although you judge I wink.
Ay, madam, you may say what sights you see; I see things too, although you judge I wink.
ay, madam, you may say what sights you see; i see things too, although you judge i wink.
ay, madam, you may say what sights you see; i see things too, although you judge i wink.
Come, come, will’t please you go?
Come, come, will’t please you go?
come, come, will’t please you go?
come, come, will’t please you go?
The Reckoning
Julia's opening question — 'should I fall in love?' — is already rhetorical; she's been in love the whole time. The scene is a brilliant study in self-deception: every time Julia is harshest with Lucetta about Proteus's letter, she moves a step closer to devouring it. By the end, she's kissing torn scraps of paper with her name and his name on them. The audience is left charmed and slightly heartbroken — Julia's love is the most real thing in the play, and she's about to be badly hurt by it.
If this happened today…
You tell your best friend you're definitely not interested in the guy who just slid into your DMs. She shows you his message. You make her delete it off your phone. She leaves the room. You immediately go back through your deleted messages, piece together what you can read, and spend twenty minutes zooming in on the fragments. You are absolutely not interested. You just want to see what he said.