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Act 1, Scene 3 — A room in Polonius’s house.
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The argument Laertes says goodbye to Ophelia, warns her against Hamlet, and gets a famous lecture from their father — who then turns around and forbids Ophelia to see Hamlet at all.
Enter Laertes and Ophelia.
First appearance
LAERTES

In this scene he is a concerned brother, not yet the man of action he becomes after his father's death. His advice is not cruel — it is the advice of someone who knows how courts work. But he is also young enough to romanticize his own warnings: 'the canker galls the infants of the spring / Too oft before their buttons be disclosed.' He speaks in elaborate metaphors when he's anxious.

LAERTES ≋ verse [Laertes says goodbye and asks Ophelia to write]

My necessaries are embark’d. Farewell.

And, sister, as the winds give benefit

And convoy is assistant, do not sleep,

But let me hear from you.

My things are packed. Goodbye, sister. As soon as the winds favor your travels, don't sleep — write to me.

I'm leaving. Ophelia, write to me as soon as you can.

i'm going write to me please

First appearance
OPHELIA

Her first substantial speech in the play is a defense of Hamlet that is also completely accurate: 'He hath, my lord, of late made many tenders / Of his affection to me.' She reports facts. She doesn't exaggerate. When she pushes back — 'I do not know, my lord, what I should think' — Polonius fills the silence with his own interpretation. Ophelia's tragedy begins here, in a scene where her intelligence and judgment are repeatedly overridden.

OPHELIA [Ophelia responds — why would I not?]

Do you doubt that?

Do you doubt it?

Of course I will.

of course

LAERTES ≋ verse [Laertes warns Ophelia about Hamlet's intentions]

For Hamlet, and the trifling of his favour,

Hold it a fashion and a toy in blood;

A violet in the youth of primy nature,

Forward, not permanent, sweet, not lasting;

The perfume and suppliance of a minute;

No more.

As for Hamlet and his attention to you — don't take it seriously. It's a passing fancy, a momentary impulse. Like a flower in spring — beautiful now, but it will fade. It's sweet for a minute, then nothing. No more.

Don't trust Hamlet's affection. It's just a passing thing. He's young, he's interested now, but it won't last. It's just a moment.

hamlet just a phase won't last don't trust it flower in spring beautiful then gone

OPHELIA [Ophelia asks for clarification]

No more but so?

No more than that?

That's all?

just that

🎭 Dramatic irony Polonius's 'to thine own self be true' will ring hollow by 4-7, when Polonius has been dead for several scenes as a direct result of his own meddling — a man who was never true to anything except political survival.
LAERTES ≋ verse [Laertes expands his warning with sophisticated reasoning]

Think it no more.

For nature crescent does not grow alone

In thews and bulk; but as this temple waxes,

The inward service of the mind and soul

Grows wide withal. Perhaps he loves you now,

And now no soil nor cautel doth besmirch

The virtue of his will; but you must fear,

His greatness weigh’d, his will is not his own;

For he himself is subject to his birth:

He may not, as unvalu’d persons do,

Carve for himself; for on his choice depends

The sanctity and health of this whole state;

And therefore must his choice be circumscrib’d

Unto the voice and yielding of that body

Whereof he is the head. Then if he says he loves you,

It fits your wisdom so far to believe it

As he in his particular act and place

May give his saying deed; which is no further

Than the main voice of Denmark goes withal.

Then weigh what loss your honour may sustain

If with too credent ear you list his songs,

Or lose your heart, or your chaste treasure open

To his unmaster’d importunity.

Fear it, Ophelia, fear it, my dear sister;

And keep you in the rear of your affection,

Out of the shot and danger of desire.

The chariest maid is prodigal enough

If she unmask her beauty to the moon.

Virtue itself ’scapes not calumnious strokes:

The canker galls the infants of the spring

Too oft before their buttons be disclos’d,

And in the morn and liquid dew of youth

Contagious blastments are most imminent.

Be wary then, best safety lies in fear.

Youth to itself rebels, though none else near.

Forget about it. A man's body grows, but so does his mind and character. Maybe Hamlet loves you now, and maybe his intentions are good. But you must understand: he's a prince. His choice isn't his own — it belongs to the state. He can't marry as he pleases; Denmark depends on his marriage. His feelings may be genuine, but only his publicly approved actions matter. So think carefully about what you risk if you believe his words too eagerly, lose your heart, or give your virginity to his uncontrolled desires. Fear this, Ophelia — protect yourself. The most careful woman is foolish if she reveals herself to the world. Even pure virtue can be damaged by rumor. Young things are vulnerable — their reputation can be destroyed before they even open fully. You're young, and you need to be very careful. Young girls naturally rebel against caution, but you must. Be cautious.

Think about it: he's a prince. His marriage isn't his choice — it's the state's choice. So even if he loves you now, he might not be able to marry you. His public actions are all that matter. So if you let him sweet-talk you or seduce you, what happens to your reputation? To your honor? Be scared, Ophelia. The most virtuous girl looks foolish if people know she's with a man. Even pure women get damaged by rumors. Young girls especially — their reputation can be ruined before they know what's happening. You need to protect yourself. Be careful.

he's a prince his marriage isn't his choice he can't marry you even if he wants to protect yourself be careful your reputation matters

"he himself is subject to his birth" Laertes's central point: royalty is not free in the way commoners are. A prince's marriage is a political act — it requires state approval. He is not being cruel; he is being accurate about how courts work. The problem is that Ophelia already loves Hamlet, and accuracy is not the same as comfort.
OPHELIA ≋ verse [Ophelia responds — turning the warning back on her brother]

I shall th’effect of this good lesson keep

As watchman to my heart. But good my brother,

Do not as some ungracious pastors do,

Show me the steep and thorny way to heaven;

Whilst like a puff’d and reckless libertine

Himself the primrose path of dalliance treads,

And recks not his own rede.

I'll remember your advice — it will guard my heart. But brother, don't be like those priests who tell people to be good while they themselves do wrong. Don't preach virtue while you chase pleasure.

I'll remember this. But you — don't be like those hypocrite priests who tell people to be good while they're doing bad things themselves.

i'll remember but you don't be hypocrite don't preach virtue while you sin

"show me the steep and thorny way to heaven whilst the primrose path of dalliance treads" Ophelia is not naive. She catches the implied double standard immediately — her brother is warning her about men while about to spend a year in Paris. Her comeback is warm but sharp. This is the Ophelia who can match wits with anyone. Watch how quickly she disappears after her father takes over.
Why it matters Ophelia's response to Laertes is one of her most fully realized moments in the play: clear-eyed, gently ironic, not passive at all. Remember this Ophelia when she later becomes unable to speak clearly. The contrast is the measure of what she loses.
LAERTES ≋ verse [Laertes reassures her and notes his father arriving]

O, fear me not.

I stay too long. But here my father comes.

Don't worry — I won't. I have to go. But here comes our father.

I won't. I'm late. Here comes Father.

don't worry i'm late father's here

Enter Polonius.
A double blessing is a double grace;
Occasion smiles upon a second leave.
First appearance
POLONIUS

His advice to Laertes is his famous set-piece and it's worth analyzing the gap between its rhetoric and its content: the maxims are polished and quotable but add up to a philosophy of guarded self-interest — 'to thine own self be true' arrives as the climax but follows advice about keeping secrets, not lending money, and not getting too close to anyone. Watch how completely his tone shifts when he addresses Ophelia: the warmth evaporates. She is property to be managed.

POLONIUS ≋ verse [Polonius scolds Laertes for still being there]

Yet here, Laertes? Aboard, aboard, for shame.

The wind sits in the shoulder of your sail,

And you are stay’d for. There, my blessing with you.

Laertes! You're still here? Get on the ship — the wind is right, you're expected. Take my blessing.

Why are you still here? Get on the boat — the wind is perfect and they're waiting for you.

go get on the ship wind is right

[_Laying his hand on Laertes’s head._]
And these few precepts in thy memory
Look thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
Nor any unproportion’d thought his act.
Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
Grapple them unto thy soul with hoops of steel;
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
Of each new-hatch’d, unfledg’d comrade. Beware
Of entrance to a quarrel; but being in,
Bear’t that th’opposed may beware of thee.
Give every man thine ear, but few thy voice:
Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgement.
Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not express’d in fancy; rich, not gaudy:
For the apparel oft proclaims the man;
And they in France of the best rank and station
Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be:
For loan oft loses both itself and friend;
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine own self be true;
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell: my blessing season this in thee.
LAERTES [Polonius dismisses the idea — affection from a prince means nothing]

Most humbly do I take my leave, my lord.

Affection! That's ridiculous. You talk like a naive young girl, uneducated in such dangerous matters. Do you really believe his declarations of affection?

Affection? That's nonsense. You're too innocent. Do you actually believe him?

affection nonse you're naive don't believe him

POLONIUS [Ophelia admits uncertainty]

The time invites you; go, your servants tend.

I don't know what to think, Father.

I don't know what to believe.

i don't know

Why it matters Polonius's advice is magnificent as a piece of rhetoric — polished, balanced, quotable. Read it as a set of values and it adds up to a philosophy of cautious self-management: protect yourself, manage your image, don't over-commit. It is the advice of a survivor at court, not a moral guide. 'To thine own self be true' is its capstone — but the 'self' it's addressed to is not Hamlet's self, or Horatio's, or any self that questions the system.
LAERTES ≋ verse [Polonius teaches her to see Hamlet's words as worthless]

Farewell, Ophelia, and remember well

What I have said to you.

I'll teach you: think of yourself as a baby. These 'declarations' of his aren't real gold — they're fake. Value yourself more highly. Either that, or I'll make a fool of both of us.

Listen: his words are worthless. You shouldn't take them seriously. Respect yourself. Otherwise I'm just a fool raising a fool.

his words fake not real value yourself respect yourself

OPHELIA ≋ verse [Ophelia defends Hamlet — his love is honorable]

’Tis in my memory lock’d,

And you yourself shall keep the key of it.

But Father, he's been expressing his love honorably.

But he's been respectful about it.

it's honorable he's respectful

LAERTES [Polonius dismisses her defense]

Farewell.

Honorably? That's what you want to call it. All right then.

Honorably? That's just what he wants you to think.

honorably sure

[_Exit._]
POLONIUS [Polonius's great speech — he teaches Ophelia the trap]

What is’t, Ophelia, he hath said to you?

Holy vows? That's just a trap — like a snare for foolish birds. I know: when desire is hot, the soul will promise anything. These vows are bright but not warm — they burn out before they're even made. You mustn't take them for real fire. From now on, be less available to him. Make yourself harder to get. Hamlet is a prince — he's young and can do as he pleases, while you cannot. I warn you, Ophelia: don't believe his vows. They're not true declarations of love — they're tricks to seduce you. They use the language of holiness to hide their unholy purpose. This is my final word: I forbid you to spend time with Hamlet or speak to him. I'm charging you with this. Come, let's go.

Holy vows? Those are just tricks to catch you like a bird in a snare. When young men want something, they swear anything. They say these vows burn bright, but they're just flash — no real fire. Don't fall for it. From now on, don't be alone with him. Make it harder for him. He's a prince — he can do what he wants. You can't. So don't believe his promises. They're just seduction disguised as love. I'm forbidding you to see him or talk to him. Do it.

it's a trap the vows are fake he's using you don't see him it's forbidden

OPHELIA [Ophelia submits to her father]

So please you, something touching the Lord Hamlet.

I will obey you, Father.

I'll do what you say.

yes father obey

POLONIUS ≋ verse [they exit together]

Marry, well bethought:

’Tis told me he hath very oft of late

Given private time to you; and you yourself

Have of your audience been most free and bounteous.

If it be so,—as so ’tis put on me,

And that in way of caution,—I must tell you

You do not understand yourself so clearly

As it behoves my daughter and your honour.

What is between you? Give me up the truth.

They exit.

They leave together.

they go ophelia polonious together

OPHELIA ≋ verse [admitting something frightening — Hamlet's attention to her has shifted things]

He hath, my lord, of late made many tenders

Of his affection to me.

He has, my lord, made many advances toward me lately — declarations of his feelings.

Yes, my lord — he's been saying a lot of things to me. Romantic things. Frequently.

hamlet keeps saying he has feelings for me it's happening i don't know what to do

POLONIUS ≋ verse [immediate skepticism — fatherly contempt for her naiveté]

Affection! Pooh! You speak like a green girl,

Unsifted in such perilous circumstance.

Do you believe his tenders, as you call them?

Affection! Ridiculous. You talk like a naive young girl, untested in matters like this. Do you really believe these declarations, as you call them?

Affection? Come on. You're talking like a kid who's never seen the world. You actually think he means all this romantic stuff?

you're being naive these aren't real you don't understand what he actually wants

OPHELIA [genuinely uncertain — caught between what she feels and what she's been told]

I do not know, my lord, what I should think.

I don't know, my lord. I'm not sure what I should think.

I don't know, my lord. I don't know what to think.

i don't know what he wants what i should believe what any of this means

POLONIUS ≋ verse [instructing her with cutting logic — money metaphor becomes the lesson]

Marry, I’ll teach you; think yourself a baby;

That you have ta’en these tenders for true pay,

Which are not sterling. Tender yourself more dearly;

Or,—not to crack the wind of the poor phrase,

Running it thus,—you’ll tender me a fool.

Well then, I'll instruct you. Think of yourself as a baby who has confused these 'tenders' — these offers — with real currency. They're counterfeit. Value yourself more highly. Or, to speak plainly without overworking the metaphor — you'll make a fool of me.

Then I'll teach you. You're treating his romantic overtures like they're real money. They're not. They're fake. You need to think you're worth more. Or put it this way — if you don't, you're making me look like an idiot.

stop being an idiot these romantic words are worthless value yourself or you embarrass me

OPHELIA ≋ verse [defending what she knows vs. what her father insists — the crack in her resistance]

My lord, he hath importun’d me with love

In honourable fashion.

My lord, he has pressed his love on me in an honorable way.

But father, he's done it honorably. He's been respectful about it.

he's been respectful he's been proper why are you like this

POLONIUS [dismissive, knowing — a father convinced of male deception]

Ay, fashion you may call it; go to, go to.

Honorable? Yes, you can call it that. But understand me.

Honorable. Sure. That's what we'll call it.

honorable that's cute that's what you think

OPHELIA ≋ verse [pushing back with her own evidence — trying to convince him with details]

And hath given countenance to his speech, my lord,

With almost all the holy vows of heaven.

And he has backed up his words with action, my lord — with almost all the sacred oaths heaven could witness.

And he's sworn to me — with all these holy oaths, like he's making promises before God. He's serious about it.

he swears he swears by heaven he uses religious oaths he seems sincere

POLONIUS ≋ verse [contemptuous wisdom — Polonius gives a full lecture on male seduction as performance]

Ay, springes to catch woodcocks. I do know,

When the blood burns, how prodigal the soul

Lends the tongue vows: these blazes, daughter,

Giving more light than heat, extinct in both,

Even in their promise, as it is a-making,

You must not take for fire. From this time

Be something scanter of your maiden presence;

Set your entreatments at a higher rate

Than a command to parley. For Lord Hamlet,

Believe so much in him that he is young;

And with a larger tether may he walk

Than may be given you. In few, Ophelia,

Do not believe his vows; for they are brokers,

Not of that dye which their investments show,

But mere implorators of unholy suits,

Breathing like sanctified and pious bawds,

The better to beguile. This is for all:

I would not, in plain terms, from this time forth

Have you so slander any moment leisure

As to give words or talk with the Lord Hamlet.

Look to’t, I charge you; come your ways.

Those oaths? They're just snares to catch foolish birds. Daughter, I know: when the blood burns hot, the soul is recklessly generous with vows. These passionate displays give more light than warmth, and they fade even as they're being made. Do not mistake them for genuine commitment. From now on, guard yourself. Make your company worth more — don't grant him easy access. Remember, he is young and can move more freely than you. In short, Ophelia: do not believe his oaths. They are merely agents of seduction, not genuine declarations. They come dressed in sacred words to deceive. This is my final word: do not waste any moment alone with Prince Hamlet. Do not speak with him. I charge you — go now.

Those are just tricks to trap you. Look, I know how this works. When a guy's passionate, he'll promise you anything — the words sound bright and important, but they mean nothing. They're gone the second he stops saying them. Don't fall for it. From now on, don't make yourself so available. Make him work for your company. Keep him at a distance — he's got more freedom than you do anyway. The bottom line is this, Ophelia: don't trust what he says. Those oaths are just tools to get what he wants. They're dressed up in religious language to trick you. So here's the rule: no talking to Prince Hamlet alone. None. Don't do it. I mean it — let's go.

he's manipulating you men use oaths as weapons they burn hot then go cold his words are fake don't be alone with him i forbid it

OPHELIA [submission — what else can she do? Her father has spoken]

I shall obey, my lord.

I shall obey, my lord.

Yes, father. I'll do as you say.

okay i'll obey no choice anyway

[_Exeunt._]

The Reckoning

Laertes is leaving for France. Before he goes, he warns his sister Ophelia that Hamlet's love, however sincere it seems, cannot be trusted — a prince can't choose freely, and she should protect herself. Polonius enters, delivers his famous farewell advice to Laertes (a string of polished maxims), and then turns to Ophelia. He interrogates her about Hamlet and dismisses the relationship more harshly than Laertes did. His prohibition isn't just cautionary — he orders her to refuse Hamlet's visits and return his letters. Ophelia obeys. The scene ends with the machinery of Ophelia's tragedy already in motion: she is being instructed to be unavailable to the man she loves, by men who believe they are protecting her.

If this happened today…

A college senior is about to study abroad for a year. Before he goes, he pulls his younger sister aside: the guy she's been seeing? He's the dean's kid. He can't actually date her seriously — his family will never allow it. Be careful. Dad comes in, gives the departing son the speech he's been saving for years — all the life wisdom he wants documented before his son leaves. Then he turns to his daughter and demands to know what's going on with the dean's kid. She tells him. He doesn't just agree with her brother; he goes further: no more contact. Don't see him. Send his texts back unread. She says yes, of course. She always does.

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